tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15982412999055589852024-03-26T23:37:40.276-07:00Get Ready It's A New Dayclaire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.comBlogger386125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-83632072510343987992014-09-23T08:57:00.000-07:002014-09-23T11:34:06.074-07:00<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Do not look forward to the changes of life in fear;</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">rather look to them with full hope as they arise,</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">God will deliver you from out of them.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">He has kept you hitherto,</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">do you but hold fast to His dear hand,</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">and He will lead you safely through all things;</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">and, when you cannot stand,</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">He will bear you in his arms.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Do not look forward to what may happen tomorrow;</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">the same everlasting Father who cares for you today</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">will take care of you then and everyday.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Either He will shield you from suffering,</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">or He will give you unfailing strength to bear it.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Be at peace, and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Last night, my sister showed me this prayer and I've been obsessed with it ever since. Currently, my family is going through a very scary, difficult time. Last week, my dad had a stem cell transplant, which involves high dose chemo that wipes out his entire immune system. In order to keep him alive, they infuse him with his healthy stem cells. This process of revitalizing his immune system takes time, so he is currently at extreme risk of infection, and now has to spend 7-10 days in the hospital. He sleeps all day, needs help walking, can hardly eat, and has become increasingly irritable. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">This current situation has obviously left each member of my family struggling through it and constantly searching for strength to continue through their day. Personally, it has been really hard for me to be away at school and have to go to my classes, do homework, etc. as if nothing is out of the ordinary. A lot of the time, I feel like a zombie and completely out of it, as my thoughts are solely centered around my dad and how he's doing. All I want to do is be at home with my family, not sitting in the library studying Neurodevelopmental Disorders.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Reading this prayer has left me feeling that maybe I CAN get through this. That maybe I really do have enough strength to keep living my life while all of this is going on. God is there for me even when I feel completely alone, guiding me towards peace, hope, and faith. The most I can do is accept Him with open arms, even when it seems easier to reject Him and just dwell on the worst. Also, this prayer made me think about all of the gifts God has given me to help me overcome this dark time. Specifically, God has given me the absolute best friends at Notre Dame. They have left me feeling completely overwhelmed with love and support countless times, and they go above and beyond to make sure I know that they are thinking of me and praying for me. I feel so lucky and blessed to have them in my life, and I don't know where I would be without them. I see God working through each one of them every day.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I copy/pasted this prayer on a "sticky note" on my laptop desktop. Now, every morning and whenever I feel down, I will read this prayer and remember that God is with me and will guide me through this journey.</span></div>
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claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-49892859471784648442014-06-28T14:51:00.000-07:002014-06-28T14:51:54.078-07:00<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">“That is why we must not be surprised if we are in for a rough time.... God is forcing us on, or up, to a higher level: putting us into situations where we will have to be very much braver, or more patient, or more loving, than we ever dreamed of being before. It seems to us all unnecessary: but that is because we have not yet had the slightest notion of the tremendous thing He means to make of us”</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Recently, my dad received some bad news about his cancer. In the past week, he has had to undergo many tests and scans, which has proved to be very difficult because of his short term memory loss and other health issues. Everything has taken twice as long as it needs to be and we have to constantly repeat what is going on and remind him of the unfortunate status of his cancer. During times like this, it's so so easy to dwell on how unfair everything is and how my dad and my family have done nothing to deserve any of these hard times. It doesn't make any sense and there is no way to fix it or make it go away, and so it feels justified to become angry with God for allowing any of it to happen. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I came across the quote above during a philosophy class this past semester. I love it because it acknowledges that we have no idea why bad things happen to the best people. Although we can't understand why we have to go through personal obstacles, God vows to never leave us alone and we must remain confident that we will only become stronger, better people on the other side. Recently, this quote has given me a lot of strength because it reminds me that I have more love and patience than I sometimes feel I have. Inevitably, I will still have my moments of frustration, sadness, and anger, but this quote helps me move away from that unhealthy place and towards a place of acceptance. Especially when we go through obstacles and tragedies, it's almost impossible to fully accept that God has a plan for each of us that we won't ever completely understand. However, I find comfort in knowing that God will help me as much as I let Him and that these trying times are providing opportunities to become the best person I can be.</span></div>
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-39676654320184993462014-04-23T11:01:00.000-07:002014-04-23T11:01:01.630-07:00<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">It’s amazing to think that I started this blog almost
exactly four years ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I first
made the blog, I remember feeling desperate to relate to someone else about all
the feelings and emotions I had been enduring.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My dad had just been diagnosed with cancer one year before, and had lost
his short-term memory three years before that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Although at the time, his cancer had made it into remission, I still
struggled with accepting all of the obstacles my dad and my family had gone
through.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His short-term memory loss especially
affected me, as I was constantly reminded of the difficult reality with his
repetitive questions and altogether different personality.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">First and
foremost, I’m proud of my seventeen-year-old self for dealing with these
feelings in such a healthy way.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Instead
of internalizing my emotions and isolating myself from others, I took my
struggles as an opportunity to potentially help others who are also going
through various obstacles.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">The main goal
of this blog continues to be to relate to others in any way that I can.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">If a simple sentence or quote strikes someone
and lessens his/her pain in any way, I’ve accomplished what I’ve sought out to
do.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">It means the world to when people
have reached out and have told me that their blog inspired them and motivated
them to keep going.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">The ability to
connect with someone in this way affects everyone involved and makes the world
feel that much less overbearing.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Although so
much has remained the same, I have also grown so much in the past four
years.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">I have learned so much about
myself, and have learned how to truly love and value myself.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Four years ago, I undermined my emotions and
thought that being strong meant not feeling sad or overwhelmed.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">I wanted to avoid these feelings, and I would
get angry with myself when I felt upset.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Now, I accept and embrace these feelings. I realize that these moments
of emotion make me human.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Instead of
making me weak, they make me strong because I am able to overcome them and
remain determined to live a happy, full life.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Life is
life and horrible, unfair, scary things happen to the best of people.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Letting this fact dominate your mentality will
only cause you to be miserable.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">If
nobody can change the inevitability of death and suffering, why not learn to
liv the best life possible while you can!? Your mortality can serve to motivate
you instead of burden you.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Nobody’s
perfect, and some days, life will get the best of you.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Simply stepping out every day with the
intention to remain peaceful and happy is enough to truly live to your full
potential.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #131313;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your
heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it
intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round
with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in
the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark,
motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become
unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”</b></span></span><o:p></o:p></div>
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-88117906705516404772014-03-20T12:19:00.000-07:002014-03-20T12:19:36.268-07:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0XJK-nf6kRz2YxCfbBBfP-8NgQQJE2-Wn-iDIAah7ydlNFQCmeU-43ZbM1nu7YeME-GvoOtHtKa-f7ERfVmbmtUlY3ASfIWZz8VD333o8Mpcpi_mCKNGZoo4HLjPX1r6iG-PKhP8RdfJo/s1600/photo.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0XJK-nf6kRz2YxCfbBBfP-8NgQQJE2-Wn-iDIAah7ydlNFQCmeU-43ZbM1nu7YeME-GvoOtHtKa-f7ERfVmbmtUlY3ASfIWZz8VD333o8Mpcpi_mCKNGZoo4HLjPX1r6iG-PKhP8RdfJo/s1600/photo.PNG" height="640" width="426" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I was recently looking through old pictures on my phone and came across this screenshot. At the time, I screenshotted it because my mom's message really struck me. At the time of this conversation (last fall), my dad had just found out that his cancer came back, and that he had very large tumors on his chest. Because of his short term memory loss, it took him a while to ingrain the knowledge that he had cancer into his memory. This time was extremely scary for my entire family. None of us had any idea of what the future would bring for my dad. For me, everything seemed to be falling apart and I had no way to control any of it. Being away from home was overwhelming and stressful, especially because I had to keep up with school even though I was constantly thinking and worrying about my dad. Scary, negative thoughts were always going through my head, and I was always preparing myself for the worst. When I got these texts from my mom, though, I began to see it all from a different light. I couldn't control my dad's cancer or what would happen to him, but instead of using all my energy worrying and being pessimistic, I could spend my time remaining hopeful by praying and going to the grotto alone or with my friends.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I hope to one day have the strength and the trust in God that my dad naturally has each day. Despite all of the horrible things he has gone through, his faith never falters. Instead, he remains confident that God will continue to be by his side, and my family's side, and that everything will be okay. Some days, it takes a lot of extra effort to maintain this mentality because all you want to do is yell at God and feel defeated. However, I hope to use my dad as a constant example to live my life like him every day regardless of the difficult, troubling events that may be occurring around me. </span></div>
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-50762185053492239642014-03-04T06:53:00.001-08:002014-03-04T06:54:31.505-08:00<div style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #1b1c1a; line-height: 1.3;">Below is a blog post from my little sister, Margaret. Everyone check out her </span><span style="line-height: 31px;"><span style="color: #1b1c1a;">amazing blog at </span><a href="http://goodvibesandpeaceofmind.tumblr.com/"><span style="color: magenta;">Absolute Compassion</span></a><span style="color: #1b1c1a;">!</span></span><span style="color: #1b1c1a; line-height: 1.3;"> Rockkk on, sista! </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 1.3;">“The fact is that when you make the other suffer, he will try to find relief by making you suffer more. The result is an escalation of suffering on both sides.” - </span><span style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: large;">Thích Nhất Hạnh</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Obviously when you are hurt by someone you want to hurt them back. It’s the first instinct. It’s a defense mechanism. But think where that will get you with that person. It will lead to so much more suffering and heartache. No one wants to be around a spiteful person who will just do stuff to hurt you.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">That is just so genuinely mean and sad that someone would just want to make you suffer. But you will always encounter those people. If you love someone and you want the best for that person, why would you want to cause suffering to that person? It makes zero sense to me but recently people do shit just to hurt me. How am I supposed to react? It just gets to me. It works. Their mean spiritedness hurts me. As much as I don’t want it to, it does.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">How do I act on it? I can’t just let it go because I have such anger and resentment. Giving a reaction will just give that person what they want. But who would want that negativity and drama in their lives?! This person is toxic and spiteful and it’s not fair. It just proves how they shouldn’t be in my life. So yes, you are supposed to let it go and do whatever you need to it away from you. Block them. Do whatever. No matter how bad I want them to be happy and want the best for them, they just want me to be sad. Why is that ok?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Know that if this is the case for you, your frequencies just don’t match. The level of awareness just isn’t the same and there is nothing you can do.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Bottom line, there is nothing you can do about it. The only option is just to let it go. If you don’t let it go there will just be more suffering. Pointless suffering. Pointless negativity. Get that negativity out of your life and live in YOUR truth</span></div>
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-51393290700137170562014-02-10T19:59:00.000-08:002014-02-10T19:59:32.960-08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizHYub4sLqw7XR2amT6hZp5Q88FMpTTLq_mf5-kSsEUMEp4UhclkARu3DEYfgTRIZuUsi2sHpqAO1nged0LC_VmCIfWxRdm9us-uvXF1bSaEyOd-bPbITW9m-x2VtiaMT0GFbb3G41O7V3/s1600/FourAgreements.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizHYub4sLqw7XR2amT6hZp5Q88FMpTTLq_mf5-kSsEUMEp4UhclkARu3DEYfgTRIZuUsi2sHpqAO1nged0LC_VmCIfWxRdm9us-uvXF1bSaEyOd-bPbITW9m-x2VtiaMT0GFbb3G41O7V3/s1600/FourAgreements.jpg" height="640" width="414" /></a></div>
<br />claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-44813426164579264222014-02-10T19:22:00.000-08:002014-02-10T20:11:27.002-08:00<div style="text-align: center;">
<b style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: xx-large;">"My actions are blissfully free from attachment to outcome."</b><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: x-large;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">This quote was the mantra for the meditation I did today. It epitomizes how I want to live each and every day. In life, the only actions I can control are my own. Because of this, I cannot let others' behavior and reactions to me define who I think I am and what I think of the world around me. As long as I seize each moment and remain the best person I can be, everything will fall into place. This mentality would be impossible if I took others' actions personally. Inevitably, some people are going to react negatively to me and will treat me badly or will simply not like me. I refuse to take these reactions personally because they do not have anything to do with me; they are reflections of their own wounds they have deep inside themselves. It means that I simply do not attract similar energies as them, and that we are not compatible in the moment. If I approach each person with love, there's absolutely nothing more that I can do. I must work to avoid focusing on what I think others want me to do or what I think I'm supposed to do to reach a specific outcome. Instead, I need to breathe and simply stay present and peaceful in each moment, leading with my most authentic self and my soul's deepest values.</span></div>
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-27604072692575308642014-02-05T20:26:00.001-08:002014-02-05T20:26:30.267-08:00<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>"At all times your world is a projection of yourself. Expansion of self to universal awareness is enlightenment."</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I was completely struck by this quote when I first saw it. This quote epitomizes how ultimately, each one of us chooses the world we live in. Sure, bad things happen to good people and we often come across difficult circumstances. It's our job to accept those uncontrollable situations, and to refuse to let them dictate how we view each moment and each day. Letting them dictate your life results in living in fear instead of love.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">If you live your life in fear, you let your daily insecurities and daily obstacles define your life and who you are. Instead, we all need to work on living with love. This means that you work to live every moment being the most authentic self that you can be. This means living life fully vulnerable and open, determined to make the most out of every situation. Of course, there will be some days where this is nearly impossible and it'll be a struggle to even get out of bed. All that matters is that you face every day trying your best. </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">By being your best, most authentic self, you are doing everything that you can in each moment.</span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;"> If you do this, you can confidently accept the fact that YOU are enough. Everything that's meant to be WILL fall into place the way it needs to because you're living your life guided by love and gratitude for every moment.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Originally, I had planned to study abroad this semester in Australia. I was so excited to get out of the South Bend winter and explore a part of the world that I had only ever dreamed about. However, last semester, I decided that it would be best to withdraw and stay close to home so that I could spend time with my family while my dad underwent treatment for his cancer. I realized that one day, I may regret going abroad and being away from my family during this time, but that I would never regret the precious times spent with my dad if I stayed at Notre Dame. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Although the decision basically made itself, it was still a huge disappointment. With this horrible, freezing weather and the additional hardship of two of my best friends abroad, this semester could be the worst, most depressing one yet. However, I refuse to let these situations dictate how I live my life. I'm determined find the little things each day to help me remain happy. Instead of focusing on all the adventures I could be having, I remember that I'm still here with some of the greatest friends, and that I have the absolute best time with them. Also, I challenge myself to meditate every morning and work out every day to stay centered and healthy. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Inevitably, there have been days where I feel like giving up and where I wish my life could be different. I accept these feelings when they come, knowing that they will pass and that I deserve to let myself feel them. The goal is not to be happy 100% of the time, but to simply accept each moment when it comes and try my best to remain my greatest self no matter what comes my way.</span>claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-72309934825654570032014-02-05T20:21:00.002-08:002014-02-05T20:21:38.845-08:00Better Late Than Never<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I haven't posted anything in about six months, but suddenly had a burst of inspiration to start trying to post again. Hopefully I can make it a regular thing again!</span><br />
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claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-3439864251933905662013-06-05T20:11:00.000-07:002013-06-05T20:11:09.913-07:00the 20- something's guide to self-acceptance<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Set the intention to change.</strong> Don’t let yourself regress by being upset over not achieving your goals immediately. Success means that you don’t stop trying. Make peace with those who have hurt you. Apologize to those you owe an apology to. You will be humbled. You will be vulnerable. You will find feelings arising that you thought were dead and buried. Sit with them. Be honest with yourself about yourself. There’s no point in working on bettering someone who isn’t really you.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Everyone is struggling.</strong> Despite what Facebook profiles suggest, nobody is perpetually thrilled with their life. The idea that you have to be is silly.<strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Learn to be okay with just being okay. You do not have to have it all together. </strong>Nobody expects that of you, and the greatest things in life usually derive from what would otherwise seem like failure.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Don’t see negative feelings as hindrances but as signs to be followed.</strong> Think of your emotions the same way you think of your physical sense of feeling. Your hand hurts if you put it on a hot stove because your body is telling you to remove your hand before it burns off. Consider what your your internal navigation and feelings are telling you to get away from (or alternatively, move toward).</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Write down the things you loathe about yourself, and be honest.</strong>Even if it hurts to be put it down on paper, and you’re hesitant to even write anything because you know this means you have to acknowledge this big-bad-terrible-horrible-no-good thing about you. Once you have a list you’re sufficiently uncomfortable with, dig. Think these things through. Consider why you behave the way you do, what influenced you to be that way, whether or not this is innately you and how these actions or traits affect your life. Work on ways to change the things you determine need to be changed.</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Understand that love is a verb, and is an action, and self-acceptance has everything to do with it.</strong> Just sitting and thinking about your positive traits and your desire to reform is good, but it’s not going to change anything.</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Realize that life is beautiful because it is flawed, and so are people.</strong> Think about somebody you love, and consider how they don’t fit into standard ideas of beauty and perfection. You love them anyway, don’t you? You even find some of these things more endearing than anything, right? Realize that you are loved no differently.</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Know that there is no right way to live. Success is subjective.</strong> You cannot follow someone else’s road map. There is no right or wrong way to do things. By accepting this, you start to realize that your life is perfect and beautiful, just not in the ways you falsely believe it should be. Understand that acceptance does not necessarily mean being happy about everything. It just means you are big enough to give acknowledgement.</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2013/the-20-somethings-guide-to-self-acceptance/">thought catalog.</a> </span><br />
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-5941606618231315722013-04-25T08:11:00.000-07:002013-04-25T08:11:04.005-07:00you never have to deal with more than one moment.<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">This is a pretty long article, but definitely one VERY worth reading. It really made me stop, breathe, and learn to take each moment at a time instead of giving into the hustle and bustle of all the stresses life brings, especially amidst finals and college life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>
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<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">If you read Raptitude you’ll see me
talk a lot about <i>moments</i>. By the end of this post you’ll
understand why I use that word so much. I grew up thinking the word
moment referred to specific instants in time, usually where some significant
event occurred. There were historic moments, life-changing moments,
poignant moments, tense moments, touching moments, Kodak moments. They were
events to be remembered, reminisced about, or photographed.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">Whatever they were, they held you
captive. Everything else seemed to drop away, and you just watched.
They seemed to be isolated from the normal, linear course of time.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">As for the rest of life, it just
seemed to be the normal, steady current of ‘stuff.’ Some fun, some pain,
some hope, some confusion, some excitement, some tedium. Same same but
different.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">When I was twenty, desperately
leafing through some forgotten self-help book, I came across a peculiar
line. It didn’t astound me at the time, but it still stuck in my
head. It kept appearing in my thoughts. I think I detected a hint
of its significance, but it was years before I fully appreciated how powerful
it is. Now I believe it is the most important thing I ever learned:</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;">Life unfolds <i>only</i> in
moments.</span></b></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"></span></b></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">Nobody has ever experienced
anything that wasn’t a moment in action. And <b>all those moments have had one thing in common, they were all <i>now </i>once.</b></span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b></b></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">So if you think about it, you may
picture life as a whole stack of moments, like a stack of photographs that show
what happens in your life instant by instant. The present moment sits at
the top, and past moments extend down from there. New moments drop from
above, as the seconds tick by. That stack of moments is your life.
Right?</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">Well, not really. There is no
stack. If there were, you could just lift a photo out of the middle and
it would be as clear and vivid as the one on top. You could sift through
your past at will, and see every detail just as if it were happening
again. You could pick a moment from way down in the stack, maybe your
fifth birthday, and recall every detail.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">I remember parts of my fifth
birthday, I think. My mom actually made us cupcakes instead of a cake
that year, one for each kid. My guests’ cupcakes each had one candle,
except mine had five because I was the birthday boy. Of that I’m certain,
but I sure couldn’t tell you what I was wearing, or list all the kids who were
there. I’ve got one or two details rattling around in my memory, but the
moment itself is gone.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">Of course I have memories, but they
are poor facsimiles of the moment they are supposed to represent. Those
memories are not a part of that moment. They’re a part of <i>this one</i>,
right now, where I’m sitting in front of my computer on the evening of April 1,
2009. They are not a part of October 8th, 1985. Even memories can
only happen <i>now</i>.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">I cannot access my fifth birthday
in any way; I’m stuck here. Now.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;">There’s really only one picture, but it keeps changing</span></b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;">. We can remember when it looked different, but we can’t
see its past incarnations with anywhere near the clarity we can with the
present one.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><o:p></o:p></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">So my fifth birthday is as dead as
Ben Franklin. This sounds kind of sad, but it’s actually fantastic news.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">If the scope of life never extends
beyond one moment, that means <b>you never have to deal with more than one
moment. </b><b>You can bring all your
attention and resources to bear on making the smartest move right now; there
needn’t be any other considerations. This means that there are <i>not</i>
a million things to do, or a million people to please. All you ever have
to do is observe the moment that is happening, and pick an action that makes
sense to you.</b></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><a href="http://www.raptitude.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/palmpolaroid.jpg"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: windowtext; mso-no-proof: yes; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;"><br /></span></span></a></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">It often doesn’t seem like it, but
life is always presented in these convenient, manageable slices<b>. The scope of your power as a person
cannot extend beyond this single moving snapshot, so there is no reason to
attempt to influence anything beyond it. Observe the moment, pick what
strikes you as a smart move, do it and watch what happens. That’s the
only responsibility you ever need to live up to. It encompasses
everything you can possibly do in life, so don’t kill yourself trying to reach
further than that.</b></span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">You do not have to figure out your
future, or come to terms with your past, because there is no future or
past. <b>Any experiences that seem to
be from the past or future <i>are not experiences at all</i>, they are just
thoughts</b>. Those thoughts are all just features of the present moment.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">Try this:</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">Hold your hands up, palms facing
each other, one beside each ear. Feel the heat radiating from your head,
and get a sense of how small the space is between your hands. It’s not
much bigger than a basketball.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;">Every single thing you’ve ever experienced, every sour memory,
every embarrassment, every triumph, every great fear and every great hope, is
confined within the space between your hands. </span></b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"> All conceptions or visions of your past and future are right
there floating above your neck, and they cannot be found anywhere else. <b>They have no weight of their own, no
permanence. They can take no form other than that of a fleeting thought.</b></span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">Rather than experiences, thoughts
are more akin to a sudden noise: they arise with a frightful clatter, and are
just as suddenly gone, leaving no trace. Unfortunately, the human mind
has some inefficiencies. <b>The mind doesn’t automatically make a
distinction between experiences and <i>thoughts</i> about experiences</b>,
regardless of whether those experiences are remembered, anticipated, or
imagined.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">If they are mistaken for the actual
experiences they represent, the person thinking them can react as such, with
the same physical and emotional distress they might have if they <i>were</i>
actually experiencing them. These physical responses can trigger other
thoughts, and the subsequent torrent of ‘noise’ can take on the appearance of a
whole lifetime of regrets and worries. They are still insubstantial thoughts,
but the physical and emotional reactions they trigger are concrete and real. <b>Simply recognizing thoughts as the phantom
ruses they are can halt this process before it happens.</b></span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;">Neither the future nor the past can
ever be dealt with, and they don’t need to be.</span></b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"> You only need to deal with your present-moment thoughts about
them. When you are not having thoughts about those two realms of time, they
bear zero relevance to your life. You can safely let them go and feel
free to deal with the living moment at hand.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><o:p></o:p></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">This truth, once I fully understood
it, released a <i>huge </i>weight from around my neck. Life wasn’t
crushing and heavy, it was as light as air. Thin as a photograph. I
was finally able to look into each moment as if it were nothing more than an
infinitely detailed and poignant living picture. I could finally take the
moments one at a time, because I understood that there never was more than
one. <b>I could appreciate and
observe each one, and know that <i>my whole life</i> lies within it, not just a
tiny fraction</b>. There are no ghastly fears out there, stalking me from
somewhere else, waiting to pounce. If they existed, they’d be right here,
in the picture for me to look at with the rest of the scenery. Moments <i>do</i>
hold me captive, and everything else <i>does</i> drop away. But they aren’t few
and far between, they’re broadcast live, 24-7.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;">Moments</span></i><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"> can be observed with clarity, and can be navigated deftly, but
our <i>whole lives </i>are just too vast to be managed at all, no matter how
strong or organized we become. The crushing weight of one’s entire past
is always too much to bear, as is the frightful spectre of another forty or
fifty years rife with dilemmas and tragedies. It’s far too complex; there
are too many contingencies and unknowns. Surely something in there will
overwhelm or destroy us.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><o:p></o:p></span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">A human being just can’t deal with
that, and often it feels like the best we can do is distract ourselves from
it. But we don’t need to.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><b><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-size: large;">We just have to recognize that there is no ‘out there’ at
all. Life is in right front of you, all of it, always. And there
isn’t any more to it.</span></span></b></blockquote>
<!--EndFragment-->claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-31227171563208532832013-04-14T18:50:00.005-07:002013-04-14T18:50:45.491-07:00don't compare yourself to anyone.<br />
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">One of the unfortunate tendencies of our humanity is comparing ourselves to each other. We’ve been doing it since we were little kids. “My dad is stronger than yours.” “My house is bigger than yours.” It continues into our teenage years and the category of comparison grow. We compare our looks, our talents, our academic achievements, our friendships, our relationships or lack thereof. The list goes on.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">In our adulthood, I do not think we become any wiser – our measuring stick continues to be the people around us. With the prevalence of social media, I can only imagine that the urge to compare one’s life to the depiction of others’ lives on social media platforms is greater for many of us. <i>Images and expressions from people seemingly to be living only the good life can leave one despaired as to why your life isn’t as good as everybody else’s. </i>Of course the reality that most people won’t tell you is that this portrayal of the good life is only partial, which is just one of many reasons that you shouldn’t compare yourself to others.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">I think many of us are fond of telling each other only the good parts of our lives. It is one of the ways in which life is a performance. <b>But the reality of everyone’s life is that we all have to endure pain in one way or the other.</b> Of course, no one likes to bring that up when they run into their friends at parties. We smile and we laugh and we tell you that life is wonderful or at least alright, even when we might be dying inside, even when we feel like our lives are completely falling apart. If you are perceptive, you know that no matter how wonderful life is, <b>even when life’s struggles are beautiful, this life that is a gift is still a life full of problems.</b></span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">The truth is most of us don’t know what each other have negotiated to be where we are in our lives. Take the example of romantic relationships. People often ask me if I ever get lonely or feel left out in comparison to my friends who are in relationships. The truth is sometimes I do – whenever I have to go to an event by myself or bring a girlfriend or guy friend to something that should ordinarily be for couples, of course I feel left out. But the truth is I have learned not to envy people in relationships because I do not know how truly happy they are; I don’t know what they endure every day on account of having a significant other, and I do not know what they have sacrificed to be in that relationship.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">Another great category of comparison is in career. As someone who has always been very diligent about school and work experience, my peers were very surprised that post-college, after failing to go to law school, I worked at a struggling start-up for a year. It didn’t pay much so I was not a high-earning graduate like people suspected I would be. But I liked my job even though it didn’t always give me the monetary satisfaction that many of my friends enjoyed. One of my friends who had landed an amazing job at a top accounting firm one day told me he envied me. I was really surprised because I envied his life. He had moved to L.A., he was a high-earning graduate, and he seemed to be living the good life. He said he envied the freedom and happiness I enjoyed in my job. To him, I was living the good life even though my life was far from it.</span></span> </blockquote>
<blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">It’s okay to want things other people have; it is quite natural and we should want good things for ourselves. But we should not fool ourselves into thinking that other people have picture-perfect lives. <i>Everyone struggles, everyone hurts, and everyone is enduring something that they probably won’t tell you about.</i> Whatever picture people paint their life as, rest assured that any one life in all its parts is beautiful and dark, hopeful and weary, a blessing and an everyday battle. <b>Focus on the good parts of your life and be grateful for your own set of problems because if you knew what everyone else was going through, you would probably still choose your own life.</b> Don’t compare yourself to anyone and while we’re at it,<i> let’s be a little kinder to each other along the way</i>.</span></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2013/dont-compare-yourself-to-anyone/">thought catalog.</a> </span><br />
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-80301666372833451282013-04-09T08:23:00.000-07:002013-04-09T08:23:10.221-07:00become aware of a silent but powerful sense of presence.<div style="text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">“Incredible change happens in your life</span></h1>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"> when you decide to take control of </span></h1>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">what you do have power over instead of </span></h1>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">craving control over what you don't.”</span></h1>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">When I read this quote, it really struck me. In life, so many things happen every day that we simply can't control. People (including me) spend way too much time trying to control these unavoidable events, using up all their energy on something that won't ever change. This causes people to feel discouraged and unsatisfied with their life. <b>This could all change if we spent less time on this and more time on acknowledging that a situation may not be ideal, but that we are strong enough to accept it and move on</b>. Of course this can be very very difficult, especially if it's something like a family illness or a death, but it's necessary if you want to fully live your life without letting the event consume you.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">I think another thing I overlook a lot is that<i> I CAN control what I focus on and what I make my priorities in my day to day life</i>. I tend to become frustrated with people who don't make an effort to keep up their friendship with me. I spend way too much energy trying to keep it alive when maybe, right now it's just not meant to be. Instead of doing this, I could easily be focusing on the amazing friendships I do have and wholeheartedly appreciating them more.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: x-large;">Also, I tend to make my priorities things that really do not matter in the long run. I too often become so preoccupied with the hustle and bustle of mindlessly studying all week and going out all weekend that I don't stop, take a breath, and realize what's truly important. I refuse to go through the motions of life, so I'm definitely going to challenge myself to <b>take more time to reflect, slow down, and go after what has real value in my life, like my relationships with friends, family, God, and myself</b>.</span></div>
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claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-85652047722839145832013-03-20T12:25:00.000-07:002013-03-20T12:25:34.153-07:00have the courage to choose happiness.<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">To me, this article from Thought Catalog encompasses how we need to look at the world every day. Embrace each morning as a new beginning; challenge yourself to seek out every opportunity to grow as a person and to better the lives of others along the way.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">It’s the end-goal of everything we do. It’s why we pray, get married, go to college, slave through tiresome days at the office, endure heartache, buy into fads, and move through (the sometimes unbearable) woes of everyday life… and more importantly, it’s why we care so damn much about it all. It’s why we are so hurt when our lives don’t become what we had hoped they would be. Its happiness, and it’s at the root of everything we desire. But what we seem to overlook is that <i>happiness is not an elusive state of euphoria that we eventually stumble upon once all of our goals are fulfilled. Happiness is a choice, and you are jus</i>t as capable of experiencing it now as you will be once your life looks as you think it ideally should.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Yes. <b>Happiness is a choice. <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">And you can choose it right now</i>. Close your eyes and decide: today, I will be happy. </b>Today, I will be grateful for everything I have, and know that everything I don’t have, I don’t need. See, the thing is, happiness is not contingent upon the next great thing you attain or accomplish. Ever notice that? You work hard for something, you get it, and then the joy of having it fades, just like everything else you have and don’t care about. And you’re on to assuming that you’ll be happy once you have the <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">next </i>thing. It’s how we’ve been conditioned: to work toward being better, richer, thinner, prettier, happier.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">But it’s not to say that aspiring to be better is bad. <i>The concept of growth is, in my opinion, the purpose of existence</i>: everything is for the development of our souls. So what if we took the energy we put toward making ourselves appear successful and happy and <b>put it toward actually being happy, right now</b>. What if we made the next goal to be happy… not in 15 less pounds from now, not in a $15,000 raise from now, not once we have the person we’ve been swooning over, not once we’re better. <i>Just now, just because we’re alive, just because we’re here, and just because there’s something in us that the world needs. </i>Because there is someone, somewhere, who loves us (or will love us) just as we are, <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">right now</i>.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Happiness, if you think about it, is the biggest conundrum we face. The pursuit of it is why we do basically everything that we do, and yet, none of that effort is necessary: it’s the simplest choice of changing our state of mind.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">But if you’re worried that being unconditionally happy for yourself is selfish, consider this. <i>Once you’re happy, you’ll find that you begin a domino effect. </i>You’ll exude peace to others. You’ll make the first impact and the ripple effect of peacemaking will follow. My inner hippie has always believed that peace for the world around us has to begin within us. We’re all preaching and fighting (note the irony) for a more peaceful existence, and yet we’re not changing ourselves. So for the sake of your own happiness, for the sake of the world around you, and for the sake of everybody who you love and care for, be happy.<b> Choose to fill yourself with love, light and positive energy.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b></b></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">You choose happiness. You choose what success is. You choose your family. You choose your home. (I personally believe it’s the person or place you always return to, but that’s just me). <b>What you may not realize is that every aspect of your life is changeable, and more important, beautiful, just as it is… because you’ve chosen it.</b> You know what you have to do now, and just like more often than not in life, you know what the right thing is. It’s just having the courage to do it. It’s easy to sit in your misery and feel sorry for yourself. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that worrying about something will change it.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>Have the courage to choose happiness</b>.</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2013/happiness-is-a-choice/">thought catalog.</a> </span><br />
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-13092083302564801902013-03-14T18:23:00.000-07:002013-03-14T18:23:38.529-07:00“happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder”<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>"The problem, often not discovered until late in life, is that when you look for things like love, meaning, motivation, it implies they are sitting behind a tree or under a rock. The most successful people recognize, that in life they create their own love, they manufacture their own meaning, they generate their own motivation.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>For me, I am driven by two main philosophies, know more today about the world than I knew yesterday. And along the way, lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised how far that gets you."</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">- </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12px; line-height: 20px; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Neil deGrasse Tyson</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 20px; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">This quote really struck me when I read it today. Too often in life, people wait around for happiness to find them. 100% of the time, these people will end up disappointed long-term. It's so important to consciously look for the positive aspects of life no matter what your situation is. This can be extremely hard and downright impossible at times, but all you can do is try your hardest to acknowledge that life may not be ideal at the moment, but at the very least you will learn something about yourself through the struggles, and you WILL end up on top. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 20px; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">In my life, a lot of the time I create images in my head of how I want things to turn out and they become so ingrained that I feel like it's the only thing that will make me happy. In reality though, this is only keeping me from freely enjoying life and finding what will truly make me happy. I am going to strive to keep this quote in mind and live by it the best I can- by simply living in the present moment, and reminding myself that if I enter life with an open, happy heart and mind, good things will come.</span></span></div>
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-66683909973374085692013-02-21T12:04:00.000-08:002013-02-21T12:04:26.551-08:00"life happens while you're busy making other plans"<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>"Know that you literally are where you are supposed to be. You are learning this stuff exactly when you are supposed to. You have to learn some stuff before you move on."</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">My mom said this to me earlier this week. I was venting to her about different problems in my life that I'm too hard on myself about. During this specific conversation, I was feeling discouraged and frustrated with myself; I felt that I wasn't living up to my highest potential. I was looking for life to happen an exact way and it was increasingly straying from this ideal I had in my mind. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">This quote from my mom made me stop in my tracks. I had never thought about it this way before. Even though I tried not to, I always held high expectations for my life which inevitably led to constant disappointments. This quote really spoke to me because it told me to <b>stop </b>and just live life. By overthinking everything and having set expectations, I was refusing to let life truly happen. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">After this conversation, I vowed to myself to strive to go with the flow and be open. Things may not always go my way, but at the same time, the best things in life happen unexpectedly. As long as I stay true to myself and continue to foster my important relationships, life WILL work out. </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: x-large;">It won't be easy to get out of my head, but the simple acknowledgement and acceptance of this tendency is the first step to allowing myself full freedom to live the best life possible. </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: x-large;">It may not happen the way I initially want it to; however, it has the potentially to be so much greater than that, making it all worth it in the end. </span></div>
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-36880098774442070532013-02-03T12:17:00.001-08:002013-02-03T12:17:39.393-08:00<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>"Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won’t either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could."</b></span></div>
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claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-8129516277541649222013-01-24T13:09:00.000-08:002013-01-24T13:09:00.041-08:0011 important thoughts and reminders for your everyday life.<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">IMPORTANT:</strong> The thing about positive reinforcement and motivation is that often times it wears off. We’re all prone to rejection, setbacks, negative funks, heartbreak and misfortune beyond our control. Those things can seem like (or actually be) sicknesses, and sometimes the right combination of words serves as medicine. Hopefully this isn’t an excruciatingly painful tablespoon of “fruit” flavored cough syrup, and more like not-so-bad instant relief and a cure for the common rut — but <b>make it last</b>. I hope this lands on your bulletin board, in your bookmarks, or somewhere for you to refer to on dull days and difficult times.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">1. You woke up this morning! A lot of people didn’t. And a lot of people who <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">did</i>, won’t survive the day. This isn’t to depress you or make you think about death and get sad and stuff, it’s just a reminder that we’ve hit the jackpot having the opportunity of life. <b>There’s always something or someone to be grateful for right this second</b>, we just have to stop letting monotony diminish the value of and our appreciation for friends, family, good health, food, water, technology, and all that other amazing stuff. Gratitude y’all.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">2. There are some flat out mean-spirited individuals who have made spewing hate and negativity their sole purpose. When you identify one of these discouraging people trying to drag you down, slow your drive, crush your confidence or compact your dreams, don’t engage. Don’t react as if their words hold any merit, and don’t seek revenge. That will only veer you off track and turn you into a pessimist yourself. <b>Do what you do and slap a hater in the face with success.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">3. <b>Don’t compare or concern yourself with everybody else.</b> We all know that person who is so successful, every time you speak to them it makes you want to go home and work on your résumé, but any time spent envying others or wondering why you can’t be in their position should be used productively, pursuing whatever makes you happy. <i>There’s always someone doing a lot better than you and there’s always someone doing much worse.</i></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">4. If there’s something you want, but it’s high risk, high reward — <b style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">take that chance</b> <b style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">before you’re no longer able to</b>. Rejection feels bad, failure feels awful, but <b>regret feels <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">the worst</i>. </b>Disappointment that we passed on something and the train left the station without us. A dream, a girl, a guy, words left unspoken – <b>you can erase the possibility of having these regrets down the road, by taking a chance and at least <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">knowing </i>if it was or wasn’t meant to be</b>.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">5. <i>All of the best things will eventually end.</i> I personally hate endings, I won’t even listen to the last track on albums all the way through, skipping back to the beginning before it can finish playing all the way through. The thing is, your current group of friends, the weekend routines you’ve adopted in recent months, the group of co-workers you adore – eventually people move, you leave, casts and locations change, and suddenly it’s a whole new show. <b>Thoroughly enjoy whatever it is you’re enjoying until you right now becomes, “<em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Remember back when…</em>”</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">6. <b>Don’t judge.</b> You ain’t Judy, you ain’t Joe Brown, and you definitely aren’t God, so refrain from condemning and labeling others. I know, it’s easy to make assumptions and have preconceived notions, but that’s why prejudice, narrow-minded folks, who confuse their opinions with facts and know exactly how everyone else should be living life are so common. We live in a world where passing judgment is commonplace and tolerant, accepting people are an endangered species. Remember, you simply don’t know a person’s background based on past experiences with individuals of the same gender, race, sexual orientation, belief system, etc.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">7. If you there’s anything you’re doing that makes you unhappy, and it’s being done for the satisfaction of somebody else, <b>stop it immediately</b>. No ifs, ands or buts — <b><span style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">your</i></span> time and happiness should never be sacrificed to fulfill the standards or satisfaction of others</b>.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">8. You can’t remain at a job or in a career field that you despise. When your days off are spent dreading having to return to work or class, you’ve got to get out. It’s easy to think, I have bills to pay and this or that reason to stay miserable, and if that’s entirely true then you have to do what you can to live, but there are still ways of forming a hasty exit plan. Save up the funds to take an extended leave, apply at the place you actually <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">want </i>to work, <b>take some type of progressive step toward a means of living that you find happiness in.</b> That first step is always the hardest to take.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">9. Use your words! If you don’t know the answer, ask. <b>Too often we try to read people’s minds instead of <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">asking</i>,</b> and hoping for others to read <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">our </i>minds instead of us having to speaking about what’s on ‘em. <b>Communication over psychic abilities all day, every day.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">10. Live below your means and you’ll be a lot better off. Even if you’ve mastered the paycheck-to-paycheck life (which is actually like being <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">really good</i> at being <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">really bad</i> at something), budgeting and not buying what you really can’t afford will result in less stress and close calls.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">11. <i>Some problems you’ll have the power to change, other things will be beyond your control</i>. Identify which type of issue you’re dealing with. If you’ve got some say in the matter, let your figurative voice be heard. <b>When it’s literally out of your hands, have faith and believe it’ll improve.</b> If a situation ever gets so bad that you feel as if you don’t have the energy or power to muster up wishing for a miracle anymore,<b> just remember that there’s always a chance it’ll get better, no matter what <i style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">it </i>is</b>. Keep fighting the good fight.</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2013/11-important-thoughts-and-reminders-for-your-everyday-life/">thought catalog.</a> </span><br />
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-86036070003068918602013-01-23T06:49:00.000-08:002013-01-23T06:49:37.875-08:00eckhart tolle's 10 powerful insights to a happier you.<br />
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>Don't seek happiness. If you seek it, you won't find it, because seeking is the antithesis of happiness.</b> Happiness is ever elusive, but freedom from unhappiness is attainable now, by facing what is rather than making up stories about it.</span> </li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it. <b>Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral, which always is as it is</b>. There is the situation or the fact, and here are my thoughts about it. Instead of making up stories, stay with the facts. For example, "I am ruined" is a story. It limits you and prevents you from taking effective action. "I have 50 cents left in my bank account" is a fact. Facing facts is always empowering.</span> </li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>See if you can catch the voice in your head, perhaps in the very moment it complains about something, and recognize it for what it is: the voice of the ego, no more than a thought. </i>Whenever you notice that voice, you will also realize that you are not the voice, but the one who is aware of it. In fact, you are the awareness that is aware of the voice. In the background, there is the awareness. In the foreground, there is the voice, the thinker. In this way you are becoming free of the ego, free of the unobserved mind.</span> </li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Wherever you look, there is plenty of circumstantial evidence for the reality of time—a rotting apple, your face in the bathroom mirror compared with your face in a photo taken 30 years ago—yet you never find any direct evidence, you never experience time itself. <b>You only ever experience the present moment</b>.</span> </li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Why do anxiety, stress, or negativity arise? Because you turned away from the present moment. And why did you do that? You thought something else was more important. <i>One small error, one misperception, creates a world of suffering</i>.</span> </li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>People believe themselves to be dependent on what happens for their happiness</i>. <b>They don't realize that what happens is the most unstable thing in the universe. It changes constantly. </b>They look upon the present moment as either marred by something that has happened and shouldn't have or as deficient because of something that has not happened but should have. And so <i>they miss the deeper perfection that is inherent in life itself,</i> a perfection that lies beyond what is happening or not happening. <b><u>Accept the present moment and find the perfection that is untouched by time.</u></b></span><b><u> </u></b></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">The more shared past there is in a relationship, the more present you need to be; otherwise, you will be forced to relive the past again and again.</span> </li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Equating the physical body with "I," the body that is destined to grow old, wither, and die, always leads to suffering. To refrain from identifying with the body doesn't mean that you no longer care for it. If it is strong, beautiful, or vigorous, you can appreciate those attributes—while they last. You can also improve the body's condition through nutrition and exercise. If you don't equate the body with who you are, when beauty fades, vigor diminishes, or the body becomes incapacitated, this will not affect your sense of worth or identity in any way. In fact, as the body begins to weaken, the light of consciousness can shine more easily.</span> </li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you and allowing that goodness to emerge</b>.</span> </li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>If peace is really what you want, then you will <a href="http://www.oprah.com/article/omagazine/omag_200805_peace" style="color: #846088; text-decoration: none;">choose peace</a></i>.</span></li>
</ul>
</blockquote>
<a href="http://www.oprah.com/oprahs-lifeclass/Eckhart-Tolles-10-Powerful-Insights-to-a-Happier-You">oprah.</a><br />
<span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span>claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-63963611213829778902013-01-12T17:27:00.000-08:002013-01-12T17:27:02.096-08:00MUST WATCH.<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/9bSu_Snlbsw" width="480"></iframe></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">This is one of the best videos I've seen in a while. I'd be lying if I said this didn't make me cry the whole way through. You won't regret it, definitely worth 12 minutes of your time. Everyone can learn a lot about this brave, selfless man and the way he takes the obstacles and hardships that have been dealt to him.</span></div>
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-58658361031132050832013-01-12T16:28:00.001-08:002013-01-12T18:11:36.756-08:0025 things to do before you turn 25.<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">1. Make peace with your parents. Whether you finally recognize that they actually have your best interests in mind or you forgive them for being flawed human beings, you can’t happily enter adulthood with that familial brand of resentment.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">2. Kiss someone you think is out of your league; kiss models and med students and entrepreneurs with part-time lives in Dubai and don’t worry about if they’re going to call you afterward.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">3. Minimize your passivity.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">4. Work a service job to gain some understanding of how tipping works, how to keep your cool around assholes, how a few kind words can change someone’s day.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">5. Recognize freedom as a 5:30 a.m. trip to the diner with a bunch of strangers you’ve just met.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">6. Try not to beat yourself up over having obtained a ‘useless’ Bachelor’s Degree. Debt is hell, and things didn’t pan out quite like you expected, but you <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">did</em> get to go to college, and having a degree isn’t the worst thing in the world to have. We will figure this mess out, I think, probably; the point is you’re not worth less just because there hasn’t been an immediate pay off for going to school. Be patient, work with what you have, and remember that a lot of us are in this together.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">7. If you’re employed in any capacity, open a savings account. You never know when you might be unemployed or in desperate need of getting away for a few days. Even $10 a week is $520 more a year than you would’ve had otherwise.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">8. <b>Make a habit of going outside, enjoying the light, relearning your friends, forgetting the internet.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">9. Go on a 4-day, brunch-fueled bender.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">10. <b>Start a relationship with your crush by telling them that you want them. Directly. Like, look them in the face and say it to them. Say, <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">I want you. I want to be with you.</em></b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">11. Learn to say ‘no’ — to yourself. Don’t keep wearing high heels if you hate them; don’t keep smoking if you’re disgusted by the way you smell the morning after; stop wasting entire days on your couch if you’re going to complain about missing the sun.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">12. Take time to revisit the places that made you who you are: the apartment you grew up in, your middle school, your hometown. These places may or may not be here forever; you definitely won’t be.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">13. Find a hobby that makes being alone feel lovely and empowering and like something to look forward to.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">14. <b>Think you know yourself until you meet someone better than you.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">15. <b>Forget who you are, what your priorities are, and how a person should be.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">16. <b>Identify your fears and instead of letting them dictate your every move, find and talk to people who have overcome them. Don’t settle for experiencing .000002% of what the world has to offer because you’re afraid of getting on a plane.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">17. Make a habit of cleaning up and letting go. Just because it fit at one point doesn’t mean you need to keep it forever — whether ‘it’ is your favorite pair of pants or your ex.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">18. <b>Stop hating yourself.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">19. Go out and watch that movie, read that book, listen to that band you already lied about watching, reading, listening to.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">20. Take advantage of health insurance while you have it.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">21. <b>Make a habit of telling people how you feel, whether it means writing a gushing fan-girl email to someone whose work you love or telling your boss why you deserve a raise.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">22. Date someone who says, “I love you” first.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">23. <b>Leave the country under the premise of “finding yourself.” This will be unsuccessful. Places do not change people. Instead, do a lot of solo drinking, read a lot of books, have sex in dirty hostels, and come home when you start to miss it.</b></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">24. Suck it up and buy a Macbook Pro.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">25. Quit that job that’s making you miserable, end the relationship that makes you act like a lunatic, lose the friend whose sole purpose in life is making you feel like you’re perpetually on the verge of vomiting. You’re young, you’re resilient, there are other jobs and relationships and friends if you’re patient and open.</span></blockquote>
<a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/25-things-to-do-before-you-turn-25/">thought catalog.</a>claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-39995229154098095752012-12-31T17:59:00.000-08:002012-12-31T17:59:00.804-08:00how to make 2013 your year.<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">With the start of a New Year looming, a popular thing to do is to claim possession of it. That’s right, tons of people are letting it be known via Facebook, Twitter and other social networks that they will be grabbing 2013 by the horns and taking control of it. What a lovely concept. Really, it sounds great in 140 characters or less. Maybe some people are hyped up on fresh start juice, and think that writing out a statement for the rest of the world to see will help those wishes come to fruition in reality.</span></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">Here’s the thing — it’s not going to be that simple. When the clock hits 12 A.M. and it’s officially January 1<sup style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">st</sup>, you’re not miraculously going to be in a different position than you are right now. You won’t suddenly be smarter, faster, stronger or better than you were on December 31<sup style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">st</sup>. There won’t be any miraculous developments or new career opportunities throwing themselves at you. <strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Things will be the same.</strong></span></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><strong style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"></strong></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">You may partake in the NYE festivities, have a good time, and when you wake up the next morning, you’ll still be the 2012 version of yourself. Same job. Same issues. Same life. You’re still the person who vocalized your desire for change recently, but what you’re doing to make certain those things happen is a whole different story.</span></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">So if everyone wants their piece of the New Year’s pie, how can you actually guarantee yourself a slice? First you’ve got to realize that many of the people claiming they’re going to conquer the world with no game plan or aspirations will soon have a rude awakening. Why? Well, because there are some hardworking individuals out there who’ve spent all of this year laboring and putting themselves in a position to succeed in 2013. Those people are at an advantage because the pursuit of their dreams isn’t postdated. They’re not waiting for a January 1<sup style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">st</sup>, they’re not talking about what they’re going to do and what changes they will make – they are actively going after these things.</span></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">The time spent telling folks that 2013 will be your personal highlight reel could’ve been spent productively working on said highlights. If you didn’t do anything in 2012 to put yourself in a position to succeed in the near future, don’t expect January 1, 2013 to be some type of miracle worker. Don’t get me wrong, a desire to be successful is great and that’s the key to making it. This isn’t about knocking those who claim 2013 as theirs; it’s just a friendly reminder that there are individuals who’ve had the same desires and plans to make next year theirs for quite some time now. With that in mind, it really just means that you’re at a disadvantage, and some dedicated hard work is in order.</span></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">Being positive and wanting to improve is never something to mock, but some people have turned it into an empty declaration. They say what they’re going to do, seeking Likes, Retweets and temporary motivation rather than making statements through their actions. If it’s not something you’re willing to do whatever it’s going to take to achieve, eventually there’ll be some roadblock reason to give up. Ask yourself, is this the real thing, or will you have given up on your 2013 takeover by February?</span></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"></span><span style="font-size: x-large;">The New Year, much like the previous one, will have its share of opportunities. If there’s something, someone, or somewhere you want to be, right this second is as good a time as any to make progressive moves. Being motivated on January 1<sup style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">st</sup> is a piece of cake. It’s the random day in June when you have to choose between the bar with friends or handling important work that’s crucial. It’s the monotonous routines you experience as you beat your craft that make a difference. 2013, much like 2012, will be exactly what you make of it. Just know that there may already be people several steps ahead of you, and embrace the challenge. <span class="tc_mark" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="TC Mark" src="http://thoughtcatalogcom.wordpress.com/wp-content/themes/vip/thoughtcatalog/custom/tc_mark.gif?m=1333992719g" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" /></span></span></span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/how-to-make-2013-your-year/">thought catalog.</a> </span><br />
claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-68978789668301175882012-12-30T12:09:00.000-08:002012-12-30T12:09:00.864-08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwVJYAN01mk9IW_il8AFZvenyU01QTEOF2WFpCdaM-c4aTvsBEN3Fe-Cu2_7JN2KbWaHR1TGZi5GQYyN0c3x5LiPkFezolRcvXeqnNTxtu7vriFiuyrknAPDeN5GQ8cBMf5QJL1yy9yNmB/s1600/tumblr_mfb8gsnYo91qajye7o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwVJYAN01mk9IW_il8AFZvenyU01QTEOF2WFpCdaM-c4aTvsBEN3Fe-Cu2_7JN2KbWaHR1TGZi5GQYyN0c3x5LiPkFezolRcvXeqnNTxtu7vriFiuyrknAPDeN5GQ8cBMf5QJL1yy9yNmB/s640/tumblr_mfb8gsnYo91qajye7o1_500.jpg" width="425" /></a></div>
<br />claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-76764941650208787492012-12-29T10:27:00.000-08:002012-12-29T10:37:12.026-08:00"my advice to you is to remember how vital family is"<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">Below is something I just came across that I posted about two years ago. Even though I realized the lessons I talk about when I wrote it, I can never be reminded enough about how important family is and how I should never take them for granted. Too often I do the opposite of what the post teaches. For example, I get frustrated with my dad's memory loss way too easily. Granted, it's extremely difficult adjusting from college to home life. I go from being able to (for the most part) remove myself from it and "forget" about it to having to come home and face it every day with expected unlimited patience. It's impossible! However, that's not an excuse. I need to learn to take a deep breath and simply <b>try my hardest</b> to give him a break and <i>remember</i> that he CAN'T <i>remember</i> and that he's trying his hardest. Every day spent with family is precious, and I need to especially remember that with mine.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Through the years, I have learned how important family is. You always hear how important they are, but it’s one of those things that goes in one ear and out the other, at least that’s how it used to be for me. That all changed about three years ago when my dad had a non-cancerous brain tumor. He had to have a surgery to remove it. During the surgery, there was a complication, and it resulted in him getting short term memory loss. Because of this, our family had to adjust to a new kind of living. My dad can no longer work. At night, he can’t remember what he did that day, etc. Our family had to become a lot stronger because of this. This kind of abrupt change in a family member is impossible to get used to- I am still not totally used to it. We had no choice, though, to accept it the best way we could and learn to live with it. It came as a surprise then, when about a year ago [almost four years ago now], my dad was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma, a rare form of blood cancer. A million questions ran through my mind- Why him? He’s very religious and goes to mass almost every day- why did he deserve this? Was it a punishment? Why did God let this happen to him and my family? For the next couple months, he was in and out of the hospital constantly, reminding me of his six week stay at the hospital three years back. Now, luckily, he is in remission. The doctors say that the cancer will unfortunately come back some time, but we are very hopeful for him to stay in remission for a long time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /><br />The thing to get out of this story is very simple- family is the most important thing you can have. Before all this happened, I never thought about how lucky I was or how blessed I was to have such a loving, supportive family. Unfortunately, it took devastating changes in my life to make me realize it. I now never take anything for granted that I do with my family. Even family dinners can mean everything. Of course, this is easier said than done and at times, I’ll be annoyed at my mom or mad at my brother, but I try my hardest not to. Also, because my dad has short term memory loss, he doesn’t remember little arguments I have with him or if I am ever in a bad mood. It teaches me to focus on the important, loving aspects of my family and to not get caught up in the small stuff that gets me upset. My advice to you is to remember how vital family is. Also, no matter what they do, it is because they love you. Don’t take them for granted. Try to let the feeling go that you’re too cool for them- stay in one night and just spend time with them.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /><br />Also, remember that God is always there for you with any problems you have. Since my life has changed, I look to God a lot for strength and hope. Without Him, I do not know how I would have the strength to keep going and be positive. When my dad first was diagnosed with cancer, I was so confused with God. I wondered why he would do this to him. I didn’t know if it was a punishment or he just simply let it happen. Now, I have realized that He does not put anyone through anything that they cannot handle. He has made me a stronger and better person through all of this. He is looking out for every one of us and we just have to have faith to be able to see it.</span></div>
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claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1598241299905558985.post-64028944194213198572012-12-28T10:11:00.000-08:002012-12-28T10:11:24.913-08:00“don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering.” <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">It's so important to make sure that you always take time to just simply <b>be</b>. So often, we get wrapped up in doing what we <i>think</i> we should do and what everyone else thinks we should do. Sometimes, you gotta just let your hair down, make a nice cup of tea, and relax. Some of my best thinking and reflecting occurs during this time, not to mention I feel so relaxed and rejuvenated afterwards. In a world of business and constant bustling around, it's easy to get caught up. Resist the need to keep up with everyone else and do what YOU need to do to make yourself peaceful and happier. Enjoy the simple pleasure of doing nothing and be endlessly grateful for the little things that make up who you are.</span></div>
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<br />claire cosgrovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06775621818015388942noreply@blogger.com3