Monday, March 28, 2011

closet door.

Dear Molly, this is gonna sound a little strange but I'd like you to paint over my old closet door. The thing is there is never a time when you will be more honest, and your convictions will be stronger, and your motives will be more pure than they are right now. Which means you should chase whatever excites you. Be confident, and take risks, and paint over my words so you can start writing your own. My story may have inspired you, but I'm certain your story will inspire the next girl to live in our room. I want you to know you don't need somebody to write about you in order for your life to mean something. You can write about yourself… make your own destiny. Then years from now the next girl will keep what you write on that door long enough to remind you how inspired your life is. And you can tell that girl to paint over the door because you realize the words you wrote, the friends you had, the urgency you felt will always be there under the paint. The love you professed will always be there, the spark of something undeniable, a seed of hope, the truth for better or for worse burning fiercely just below the surface. Love Peyton.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

how to wake up every morning on top of the world.

When you wake up in the morning you are always asking yourself questions whether you realize it or not. As you brush your teeth, drink your coffee or eat your breakfast thoughts are running through your head. You might be thinking “why am I so I tired, why didn’t I sleep earlier, what am I going to eat, etc, etc.”


These things generally don’t serve any useful purpose and in some cases as you can see are even hurting you. The idea behind using questions is to take conscious control of the direction of your day. So, let me give you a few examples of things that you could ask yourself first thing in the morning:


◦What do I have to look forward to today?
◦What’s absolutely perfect about my life?
◦How can I make today absolutely awesome?
◦What’s the best thing that could happen today?
By asking yourself these kinds of questions you start to shift the focus of your mind towards all of the things you want to have happen. One interesting thing to note is that your questions don’t need to have any basis in reality because your brain will answer anything you ask it quite literally. So if you’re going to be delusional, you might as well make your delusions extremely empowering.


The key to using this effectively however is to do it for 30 days in a row. What happens when you do this is that your brain will create a link, known as a neuro-association, between the empowering states you create with your questions and being awake in the morning.


One Question to Ask Yourself Every Morning


For about two weeks now, I’ve been asking myself one question from the moment I wake up. “What am I grateful for?.” You’ve heard before that you should start every single day with an attitude of gratitude. This is probably the simplest way to actually do that.


If you ask yourself that question enough days in a row you will wake up feeling on top of the world every single day. As you start to view your life and the world around you as full of things to be grateful for, you’re going to bring more and more of that into your life.


We all have lots to be grateful for, but we often get caught up in all the things that are wrong with our lives. Hopefully this will enable you shift your focus.
tiny buddha.

you can do it.


It’s worth it. Every minute of it. Life really is. Think about it. Just take a minute. You may be the most miserable person reading this right now, or happier than ever, but I assure you, it’s worth it regardless of how you feel. I don’t care if you’re Christian, Jewish, Atheist, or whatever you believe. I don’t care what your political view is, I don’t care if you just made a million bucks or only 50 today at the minimum wage you hate more than anything. Those things don’t really matter. Not in the end. Can we really be sure of any end? I don’t believe we can, so the best I can do is be as happy as possible for as long as possible. Cause it’s worth it! Who knows how long we are going to be here, who knows how lucky we are to be able to experience this. Experience as much as possible! Take a random trip and get lost, only to find your way back by an adventure. Tell that girl or guy how you feel, because honestly you fail 100 percent of the chances you don’t take. And no one likes those chances. I have to say i believe in karma. Those who do good will get good, maybe not now, maybe not in 5 years, but before it’s all said and done, those people can say “I am content with dying.” And that makes all the difference. Go to bed every night asking yourself if you’d have any regrets if you had died today. If the answer is yes, make tomorrow better than today. Live it to the fullest! I can’t begin to describe to you how important it is. I don’t care how much money I have or how good I am at something. I don’t worry about what everyone else thinks or what people think of me. We have an incredibly short amount of time on this Earth, and I hope you want to enjoy every minute of it. You always have a choice. A choice to be happy. But we choose to cry sometimes, or to hide, because we are not strong enough. Well I’ll tell you right now you’re damn good enough. You’re good enough for yourself, and that special someone, and your precious dog that loves you no matter what, and your family no matter what problems they may have. Don’t think everything has been all well for me. Things have gotten bad for me let me tell you. I hate to be negative, but I’ve been there. I had/have an alcoholic mother. I never knew my real dad. He died a few years ago. I should have two brothers but they died. My uncle committed suicide. But it’s ok. It hurts, and I’ve accepted that. But it certainly is not worth wasting my precious time on this wonderful place. Making the best of it and being as happy as possible is what gives me this outlook and it can to you, I wouldn’t be sitting here writing all this otherwise. You can do it. All of you. If you’re already there, great! Spread your happiness! If you’re not, you can! I don’t know what else to say! There’s so much to live for you can even begin to fathom! You just have to start somewhere. Start with telling that person how you feel. Start with going on that roller coaster. Start with sitting out at night looking at the stars. Start with anything that motivates you, and makes you happy! Go from there, go do the next thing that sounds good to you, as soon as possible! You will find fulfilling your inner motivations and goals and dreams will make you the happiest. And please, I know it’s hard, but don’t worry about others too much. They don’t know better. They are just following everything everyone else has established as “right”. Like only being successful if you get A’s. Or that promotion. Or hookup with that girl. That’s what they want and like to see other people do. If it’s really you, great, but if it’s not, don’t sweat it.


I really could go on all day. Enjoy the little things, and don’t ever, don’t you ever give up.


Because It’s Worth It,
EF


letters i'll never send.

super girl.



Dear whoever,

I want to be that girl who can laugh through her tears.

Smile through her pain.

Who, even when she hits rock bottom, can feel like she’s on top of the world.

Who, despite her own troubles, can help those who need it with theirs.

Who will always be there for her friends with a kind smile and a shoulder to cry on.

Who can be at her strongest in her darkest hour

Who can speak her mind, unafraid of what others think

Who loves herself

I want to be fucking Super Girl.

Love,

Me and what will soon be my awesome self.
letters i'll never send.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

never underestimate the power of even your smallest actions.

Story I found online-



One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd."


I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.


As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, I saw a tear in his eye.


As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives. " He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!" There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude. I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.


As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.


He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.


Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday! " He just laughed and handed me half the books.


Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were seniors, we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football scholarship.


Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.


Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous. Today was one of those days.


I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. "Thanks," he said.


As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began. "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story."


I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."


I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth. Never underestimate the power of your actions.


With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others.

listen to the mustn'ts.

ten rules for being human.

ten rules for being human.
1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it's yours to keep for the entire period.


2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called, "life."


3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error, and experimentation. The "failed" experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiments that ultimately "work."


4. Lessons are repeated until they are learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can go on to the next lesson.


5. Learning lessons does not end. There's no part of life that doesn't contain its lessons. If you're alive, that means there are still lessons to be learned.


6. "There" is no better a place than "here." When your "there" has become a "here", you will simply obtain another "there" that will again look better than "here."


7. Other people are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.


8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.


9. Your answers lie within you. The answers to life's questions lie within you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.


10. You will forget all this.

a polaroid a day.

This man, Jamie Livingston, took a polaroid a day for about twenty years.  All the pictures vary from everyday objects to pictures of family and friends.  I thought this was a really cool idea.. It captures one's life in a unique and special way that lets people have a personal glipse and outlook on it.  I kind of want to do something like that..




























..or die trying.

be you.








"Once you discover your nature, your identity, your destiny, your potential- accept it, take hold of it and follow it.
Do not hurt yourself- do not deny yourself of who you are, what you are capable of doing. Often it seems easier to take the other path, mold yourself into what society may expect from you. Be strong.

Do not allow yourself to be the intelligent man who lives a stupid life, the woman who values truth but lives in lies, the artist who sits typing numbers at a desk. Sometimes we may need to take on these roles to get where we are going- but do not let them become you. Hold fast to your dreams and continue to reach for them. Again, it may seem easier to give up and give in but that would be doing wrong to yourself.

Things in life are not always easy, but as Maslow suggests, growth and improvement can come through pain and conflict. Make mistakes, but don't forever dwell on them... pick up the pieces, learn your lesson and move on. You will forever be a better person from each mistake you make and lesson you learn.

Pursue your happiness. Keep in mind that your emotions are there to guide you, negative emotions often indicate you're pursuing the wrong thing/on the wrong path. Positive emotions often work as reinforcement; you're doing the right thing and thus it feels good. Listen to those feelings.

Respect yourself, respect who you are and what you wish to do.
Do not deny yourself of your own nature.

Be you."








Thursday, March 17, 2011

wild geese.

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting—
over and over announcing your place in the family of things.

(- Mary Oliver, Wild Geese) 

Sunday, March 13, 2011

“a friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.”

"Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing.  There is a time for silence.  A time to let go and allow people hurl themselves into their own destiny.  And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it's all over."

For a while, for me, I always took it so personally if a friend didn't take my advice for a situation.  I would get so frustrated and become way more involved than I needed to. That was a while ago, and luckily I've learned that it's simply my job to be there and keep giving that advice even though ultimately it's up to them to realize what they need to do.  It's so important to know this because it's way too easy to get annoyed and fed up with people who continue to make mistakes. You can't take it personally because it has nothing to do with you. For me, now that I've realized that important lesson, I try to always be there for all my friends, while staying at a distance where I can't get sucked in to it. This quote captures what it takes to be a friend and shows that, even though it's stressful and difficult at times, it's worth it and those friends need you to always be there for them, no matter what. I try to live that out by always staying close with my friends. Even if I have a falling out with someone, I try to eventually, with time, get it back where we are semi-close again because I don't want to go through life losing friendships that mean something to me. Time is the healer of friendships and bad situations, and even though sometimes it may seem like it will never get better, it does. Nothing lasts forever- time will fix it and make it okay again.

as we go on, we remember, all the times we had together.

secrets to eating a healthy diet.

1. Diversify your diet and include all foods. A balanced meal is one consisting of carbohydrates, protein and fats (yes, fat!). Carbohydrates provide quick energy, protein builds muscle, and fat sustains energy for up to four hours. You can’t lead an active lifestyle without fuel. Eating meals and snacks that contain carbohydrates, protein and fat is the best way to feel satisfied and have sustained energy.


Start by including foods from all of the food groups in your diet, such as low-fat milk and dairy products, fruits, vegetables, whole grains and lean meats like seafood, beans, eggs and nuts to create balanced meals. Aim to have at least three food groups represented in each snack or meal, and the variety will ensure you get the energy, vitamins and minerals you need.


2. Customize and individualize your diet. Incorporate your personal values into your food choices, and set realistic goals that you know you can accomplish. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to healthy eating. You are unique and therefore your diet approach should be as well. Is it important for you to buy local food? Are cost and convenience your priorities? Do your cultural traditions take precedence? Consider all of these factors as you take small steps toward your healthy eating goals.


3. Enjoy what you eat. How do you balance weight management with “enjoying” food? Taste, flavor, satiety and pleasure are all important parts of eating, and these factors should be a part of your healthy eating plan. With some savvy meal planning and preparation, you can balance your diet across all five food groups and still include some of those “indulgences” without feeling guilty.


fit bottomed girls.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

live the life you've imagined.

"Promise yourself to be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future. Give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others. Live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you!"


Sunday, March 6, 2011

happiness is a journey.

it's your life- what you gonna do?


Everyone should try to live their life like this little girl shows. Of course it's easier said than done some days, but strive to find the little things in life each day that make you happy-- even if it's just one fun thing you did or one person who gave you a nice smile. Every single person has good things in their lives, no matter what. It's just a matter of finding it.