Tuesday, May 31, 2011
“the stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.”
One of the things I've struggled with, and I'm sure everyone does, throughout friendships is accepting the flaws and moving on from them. It's hard to realize and accept that people are who they are and they're going to hurt you sometimes. I've had multiple falling outs with friends because one of us, or both of us, get hurt and can't seem to find a way past it. I've always strived, though, to eventually move past it and forgive with time. I am proud of myself that at the moment, there is nobody who hates me/I hate/I can't be around. I'm at a relatively good place with all of my friends and I find that to be a positive part of my life. However, some of my friends think that in cases where friends hurt you, you should just get them out of your life and never look back and so, they disapprove of my friendships with the people who have wronged me. I believe that everyone should protect themselves and not put themselves into positions where they'll get hurt, but at the same time, holding grudges and staying stuck on petty fights or falling outs does not do any good to you or your mentality. You're going to never be able to grow and learn from these experiences because you'll be stuck with the anger and resentment towards the other person. It can seem impossible in the midst of it all, but forgiveness is attainable if you work towards moving forward and finding the positivity and strength to look past it and be able to wish the person well. Holding grudges and not having your heart open to forgiveness will only close you off to future opportunities and ultimate happiness. So, I challenge all of you to, no matter how serious or hurtful the situation be, work to let go of any pain and maybe even move on enough to be civil with the person. You should never try to get back the same friendship you had before, as you will just end up in the same situation, but a matured, altered, and maybe even cautious friendship is possible. It takes tears, frustration, and work to get to that point, but the freedom and sense of peace is 100% worth it.