i've seen better days but i still got my friends,

“Somewhere there is someone that dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worthwhile, so when you are lonely remember it’s true, someone somewhere is thinking of you.”

and you can tell everybody, this is your song.

'cause those who mind don't matter in your life and those who matter don't mind what you're like.

60 ways to become the person you love.

60. Eliminate shoulds.

59. Enjoy down time.

58. Run towards your fears.

57. Be dependable.

56. Embrace self-responsibility.

55. Be completely honest.

54. First meet your own needs.

53. Notice the beauty around you.

52. Open your mind to change.

50. Set attainable goals.

49. Go at your own pace.

48. Honor your individuality.

47. Open yourself to umlimited possibilities.

46. See the humor in things.

45. Celebrate your imperfections.

44. Reward yourself.

43. Be flexible.

42. Be gentle with yourself.

41. Be open to being wrong.

40. Laugh for no reason.

39. Light candles.

38. Enjoy nature.

37. Get a message.

36. Congratulate yourself.

35. Know yourself.

34. Appreciate where you are today.

33. Give yourself space.

32. Breathe mindfully.

31. Communicate your emotions.

30. Learn to relax.

29. Meditate.

28. Say no more often.

27. Experience new things.

26. Take mini breaks throughout the day.

25. Create personal affirmation cards, use daily.

24. Hang out with positively happy people.

23. Schedule fun times for yourself.

22. Make your car a sanctuary.

21. Dress for success.

20. Be impecably groomed.

19. Balance your energy.

18. Recharge your batteries.

17. Refuse to argue.

16. Balance your diet.

15. Sleep sound.

14. Persevere.

13. Feel and express gratitude.

12. Give up self put-downs.

11. Develop your intuition.

10. Learn to hold your own hand.

9. Accept your physical appearance.

8. Keep your cool.

7. Vent in a positive way.

6. Speak kindly of yourself.

5. Be brave. 

4. Learn to calm yourself.

3. Listen to music.

2. Make the most of every opportunity.

1. Start fresh each day.

the bold life. 

just the little things.

just little things.

8 tips to feel better about yourself.

1. Do a good deed. Be selfless, if only for selfish reason; you’ll benefit as much as the person you’re helping. When I’m feeling low, forcing myself to do something for someone else's benefit seems particularly hard, but then it gives me a big boost. As Montaigne observed, “These testimonies of a good conscience are pleasant; and such a natural pleasure is very beneficial to us; it is the only payment that can never fail.” In the same vein…     

2. Make small gestures of good citizenship. Bring your old magazines to the gym so other people can read them. Pick up trash that other people have left on the subway. Sign up to be an organ donor.

3. Keep a resolution. Not only will you benefit from exercising or cleaning out your garage, you’ll also get a boost from the mere fact that you made a commitment and stuck to it. Feeling so overtaxed that you can't face the thought of trying to keep a resolution? Try this one: Make your bed. Just do that one thing. I know it sounds a bit preposterous, but many people have told me what a lift they've received from that small act.

4. Become an expert. There’s great satisfaction in mastery. Pick a subject that interests you, and dig in deep: the American Revolution, the works of Chekhov, wine, The Wire (my husband and I are currently obsessed with this TV show).

5. Boost your energy. Studies show that when you’re feeling energetic, you’re much more likely to feel good about yourself. For a quick shot of energy, take a brisk ten-minute walk (outside, if possible, where sunlight will also stimulate your brain), listen to some great music, or talk to a friend.

6. Challenge yourself physically. This tip doesn’t work for me, but I know that many people feel great after para-sailing, white-water rafting, surfing, or rollercoaster-riding.

7. Face a fear. Some fears are physical (see #6), but not all fears. You might push yourself to speak in public, ask someone on a date, make a gesture of friendship toward an acquaintance, or begin an intimidating creative project. In these trying situations, I often comfort myself by repeating "Enjoy the fun of failure." And it's true, even when my effort fails, I feel good about the fact that I gave it a shot. As my sister the sage reminded me recently, "You've got to put yourself out there." Which is hard, but gratifying.

8. Make something by hand. There's something particularly satisfying about making something with your own hands, whether it's a loaf of bread, a photo album, a piece of furniture, or a fly-fishing fly. It's tangible, it's creative, it's right in front of you. Similarly, making visible improvements like cleaning out a closet can give a big boost. I get an (inexplicably) large boost just from changing a light bulb. I delay, I delay, I delay -- and then finally I change it! A triumph!

the happiness project.

I've posted this quote before, but I just came across it and remembered how much I loved it-

"Love is not the admiration of perfection but the acceptance of imperfection, because loving and accepting makes us better and stronger."

dorm room diet.

Helpful article I found online about eating healthily in college-

Here are YOUR questions answered by Dormify friend, Daphne Oz.

Can you eat healthy without eating organic? I'm living on a college student’s budget, and I can't afford to spend a lot on groceries! – Alix, USC ‘14Absolutely! There are a couple foods that you should definitely try to buy organic because they are too difficult to clean and are loaded with pesticides and preservatives that can be very damaging to your health; they’re called the “Dirty Dozen” and you can check them out here. However, for most fruits and veggies, you can buy an inexpensive produce wash—like this one to clean your conventional produce so that you get the health benefits without the unnecessary price tag.

I'm working on a double major, working a part-time job on weekends, and I am rush chair for my sorority, leaving NO time for exercise. How can I stay toned when I feel like I don't even have time to sleep?!  Heather, Penn ‘13The most important thing to remember is that exercise does not need to take place in a gym. Even if it’s just a ten-minute break while you’re studying to run stairs, or going to a bathroom on a different floor, or walking your errands, getting more activity in your day will keep your metabolism running high. Sounds like you have a ton on your plate, so I’m not worried about you being too sedentary. Your legs will get plenty of tone from walking around everywhere, but to take advantage of study time or any other time when you are sitting still, invest in light 3lb weights and do high repetitions to target your triceps and biceps. And don’t forget to take time to stretch—it will keep your blood moving, relax you, and help build long, lean muscles.

At my school, the social scene is all about the frat parties, and the only drink options are beer, which I hate, and the endless vats of “jungle juice” and I can't even begin to guess how many calories that mess of juice and liquor could have. Any good tips for how I can party hard without blowing up? – Faith, Virginia Tech ’14You definitely want to stay far away from the Jungle Juice! You’re absolutely right, there could be a Thanksgiving’s worth of calories in that concoction. If you want to prepare yourself a drink before heading to the party, I would go for either a glass of wine or a shot of vodka or tequila with soda water and some fresh lime juice. Once you get to the party, I would try pouring yourself half a glass of beer and then watering it down to dilute the flavor, so at least you have something in your hand while you’re at the party—you probably won’t be tempted to drink a whole bunch of it if you’re not a real fan of the taste, but it’s nice to have something to sip while you’re out.

The dining hall food does not agree with my stomach––or my digestive system––but I can't starve myself! Any tips for navigating the dining hall without sticking to cereal only? Reisha, Indiana University ’14I wonder if maybe you have some kind of undiagnosed allergy, like a gluten- or lactose-intolerance that could be affecting your stomach after you eat at the dining hall? I would try an elimination diet and see how you feel—rule out dairy for a week, then rule our breads and cereals for a week, and just see how your stomach reacts. In general, starting any dining hall meal with a big salad filled with crunchy veggies and some good veggie protein—like beans, chickpeas, or even hummus—is a great way to fill up, and then you can enjoy small tastes or side dishes of the meal items that you might enjoy the taste of but that don’t make you feel great, if you don’t want to cut them out altogether. Also, a great way to cut down on processed sugars and tons of unnecessary salt and fat is to make your own salad dressing. I like a mixture of 2 parts balsamic vinegar to 1 part olive oil, a dash of soy sauce and honey, and a little spoon of Dijon mustard to taste. You can also add orange juice in place of the honey for a citrus splash. 

What do I do during pledging when my sorority sisters make me eat fatty foods but I am used to eating healthy?  - Kendra, Alabama ‘15This is an excellent question and one I unfortunately don’t have an easy answer to. Either you have to tell your sorority sisters that it’s important for you to eat healthy and you would rather not eat what they’re offering and see what they say, or you have to suffer through the food they want you to eat and then make sure that you are eating well and exercising on your own. Obviously, eating a ton of fatty foods regularly is not great for your health, but it’s good to keep in mind that our bodies actually balance food intake over three days, so if you eat really well on Monday and Wednesday but are forced to eat some bad stuff on Tuesday, chances are your body will know how to balance it all out.

During summer session at Penn State, I always snacked unhealthily while watching Sunday night TV shows with my friends when they would whip out the chips and salsa. Typically, I wouldn't eat this way but can't help it when I'm with them and everyone is munching. What do you suggest? - Blaire, Penn State  ‘15The best thing to do in group eating situations when you want to be a part of the activity and socializing but don’t want to go overboard with the snacking is to put aside the small portion you are comfortable eating in a bowl or napkin and only eat from that amount. This way, you get to enjoy the foods your friends are without falling prey to eating out of the bag, which is so tempting especially when you’re eating while distracted, like while watching a favorite tv program or chatting with friends. Giving yourself a set portion you are comfortable with takes the stress away by allowing you to pace yourself and enjoy the social activity rather than focusing on how much food you are eating.

Carbs- can't live with them can't live without them! What is your take on the dreaded 5 letter word? – Jordanna, GWU ‘13Carbs are absolutely essential to healthy body function—they’re the building blocks that allow for healthy muscle function, blood sugar regulation, and brain communication, so you don’t want to rule them out! That said, making sure to go for complex carbohydrates whenever you can—that is, the ones where you can still see the grains intact, meaning they have fiber encasing the sugar inside so your body has to work harder to digest them—is the best way to enjoy carbs that will keep you full for longer while ensuring you don’t have a blood sugar spike that could leave you in a carb-craving cycle all day. The best choices are whole grain breads, brown rice, barley, lentils and quinoa.

We know eating late is bad, especially “late night eating” after a night of partying. But what's the best thing to eat late if you’re up studying until 11pm and haven’t had a chance to eat dinner?  - Amanda, Wash U ‘13When it comes to studying, if you know you have a late night ahead of you, the best thing you can do is plan ahead. Stock your dorm room with:-Hard fruits like apples and pears, and some citrus for the great vitamin C that will help you stay away and provide a great immune boost-Soychips for that salty-crunchy craving we all get, with an added dose of healthy protein to help you stay full -A small handful of chocolate chips to hit the sugar craving without going overboard with processed fats and sugars, or too many calories If you’re looking for a late night snack, the general rule of thumb is to go for unprocessed food—your fruits and veggies are the best bet, and you can keep them interesting with fun dips. For savory dips, I liked making a delicious yogurt mixture with dill and garlic salt, and for sweet, try a spread of almond butter, or adding some crushed graham cracker, cinnamon and honey to Greek yogurt for a delicious “cheesecake” dip for fruit.

dormify.

always, always, always believe in yourself.

"This life is what you make it. Not matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. And babe, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up because if you give up, you'll never find your soul mate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about." 

- Marilyn Monroe

imma be.

One of my best friends recently made a blog.  I find it so inspiring and motivating to read, and I think everyone should read it. Sooooo, check it outtt!

Take Two. Next Chapter.

everything will be okay.

this could really be a good life.

Earlier today, I was thinking about the phrase "everything happens for a reason".  I think that people can either find that really inspiring or really frustrating.  For those dealing with family members/friends who get cancer, tragically die, etc., this quote can end up making them feel alone, defeated, and confused.  I think a good way to interpret this quote is that there really is no reason for a lot of things that happen in life.  However, you can choose to create positive lessons and experiences out of negative, tragic, difficult situations.  For example, in my life, there's no reason God allowed my dad to get cancer and to lose his short term memory and to have my family undergo all these rough changes that go with it.  I've come to realize, though, how much I've grown and learned from having to deal with this every day.  I've learned to have patience and to be able to handle more than typical people my age.  I would never ask for any of this to happen to my dad, but since I can't undo it or change it, I might as well look at how I'm growing from it.  Nobody's life is perfect; challenge yourself to look at the hard times you inevitably face in a different way.  There will be days when you feel down and defeated- everyone has them, but it's the overall motivation to look at the positive side and at the important fact that YOU ARE NOT ALONE in any of this.  With these thoughts in mind, you can get through anything. 

reasons to believe.