Do not look forward to the changes of life in fear;

rather look to them with full hope as they arise,

God will deliver you from out of them.

He has kept you hitherto,

do you but hold fast to His dear hand,

and He will lead you safely through all things;

and, when you cannot stand,

He will bear you in his arms.

Do not look forward to what may happen tomorrow;

the same everlasting Father who cares for you today

will take care of you then and everyday.

Either He will shield you from suffering,

or He will give you unfailing strength to bear it.

Be at peace, and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations.

Last night, my sister showed me this prayer and I've been obsessed with it ever since. Currently, my family is going through a very scary, difficult time. Last week, my dad had a stem cell transplant, which involves high dose chemo that wipes out his entire immune system. In order to keep him alive, they infuse him with his healthy stem cells. This process of revitalizing his immune system takes time, so he is currently at extreme risk of infection, and now has to spend 7-10 days in the hospital. He sleeps all day, needs help walking, can hardly eat, and has become increasingly irritable. 

This current situation has obviously left each member of my family struggling through it and constantly searching for strength to continue through their day. Personally, it has been really hard for me to be away at school and have to go to my classes, do homework, etc. as if nothing is out of the ordinary. A lot of the time, I feel like a zombie and completely out of it, as my thoughts are solely centered around my dad and how he's doing. All I want to do is be at home with my family, not sitting in the library studying Neurodevelopmental Disorders.

Reading this prayer has left me feeling that maybe I CAN get through this. That maybe I really do have enough strength to keep living my life while all of this is going on. God is there for me even when I feel completely alone, guiding me towards peace, hope, and faith. The most I can do is accept Him with open arms, even when it seems easier to reject Him and just dwell on the worst. Also, this prayer made me think about all of the gifts God has given me to help me overcome this dark time. Specifically, God has given me the absolute best friends at Notre Dame. They have left me feeling completely overwhelmed with love and support countless times, and they go above and beyond to make sure I know that they are thinking of me and praying for me. I feel so lucky and blessed to have them in my life, and I don't know where I would be without them. I see God working through each one of them every day.

I copy/pasted this prayer on a "sticky note" on my laptop desktop. Now, every morning and whenever I feel down, I will read this prayer and remember that God is with me and will guide me through this journey.

“That is why we must not be surprised if we are in for a rough time.... God is forcing us on, or up, to a higher level: putting us into situations where we will have to be very much braver, or more patient, or more loving, than we ever dreamed of being before. It seems to us all unnecessary: but that is because we have not yet had the slightest notion of the tremendous thing He means to make of us”

Recently, my dad received some bad news about his cancer. In the past week, he has had to undergo many tests and scans, which has proved to be very difficult because of his short term memory loss and other health issues. Everything has taken twice as long as it needs to be and we have to constantly repeat what is going on and remind him of the unfortunate status of his cancer. During times like this, it's so so easy to dwell on how unfair everything is and how my dad and my family have done nothing to deserve any of these hard times. It doesn't make any sense and there is no way to fix it or make it go away, and so it feels justified to become angry with God for allowing any of it to happen. 

I came across the quote above during a philosophy class this past semester. I love it because it acknowledges that we have no idea why bad things happen to the best people. Although we can't understand why we have to go through personal obstacles, God vows to never leave us alone and we must remain confident that we will only become stronger, better people on the other side. Recently, this quote has given me a lot of strength because it reminds me that I have more love and patience than I sometimes feel I have. Inevitably, I will still have my moments of frustration, sadness, and anger, but this quote helps me move away from that unhealthy place and towards a place of acceptance. Especially when we go through obstacles and tragedies, it's almost impossible to fully accept that God has a plan for each of us that we won't ever completely understand. However, I find comfort in knowing that God will help me as much as I let Him and that these trying times are providing opportunities to become the best person I can be.

Below is a blog post from my little sister, Margaret.  Everyone check out her amazing blog at Absolute Compassion!  Rockkk on, sista! 

“The fact is that when you make the other suffer, he will try to find relief by making you suffer more. The result is an escalation of suffering on both sides.” - Thích Nhất Hạnh

Obviously when you are hurt by someone you want to hurt them back. It’s the first instinct. It’s a defense mechanism. But think where that will get you with that person. It will lead to so much more suffering and heartache. No one wants to be around a spiteful person who will just do stuff to hurt you.

That is just so genuinely mean and sad that someone would just want to make you suffer. But you will always encounter those people. If you love someone and you want the best for that person, why would you want to cause suffering to that person? It makes zero sense to me but recently people do shit just to hurt me. How am I supposed to react? It just gets to me. It works. Their mean spiritedness hurts me. As much as I don’t want it to, it does.

How do I act on it? I can’t just let it go because I have such anger and resentment. Giving a reaction will just give that person what they want. But who would want that negativity and drama in their lives?! This person is toxic and spiteful and it’s not fair. It just proves how they shouldn’t be in my life. So yes, you are supposed to let it go and do whatever you need to it away from you. Block them. Do whatever. No matter how bad I want them to be happy and want the best for them, they just want me to be sad. Why is that ok?

Know that if this is the case for you, your frequencies just don’t match. The level of awareness just isn’t the same and there is nothing you can do.

Bottom line, there is nothing you can do about it. The only option is just to let it go. If you don’t let it go there will just be more suffering. Pointless suffering. Pointless negativity. Get that negativity out of your life and live in YOUR truth

"My actions are blissfully free from attachment to outcome."  

This quote was the mantra for the meditation I did today. It epitomizes how I want to live each and every day. In life, the only actions I can control are my own. Because of this, I cannot let others' behavior and reactions to me define who I think I am and what I think of the world around me. As long as I seize each moment and remain the best person I can be, everything will fall into place. This mentality would be impossible if I took others' actions personally. Inevitably, some people are going to react negatively to me and will treat me badly or will simply not like me. I refuse to take these reactions personally because they do not have anything to do with me; they are reflections of their own wounds they have deep inside themselves. It means that I simply do not attract similar energies as them, and that we are not compatible in the moment. If I approach each person with love, there's absolutely nothing more that I can do. I must work to avoid focusing on what I think others want me to do or what I think I'm supposed to do to reach a specific outcome. Instead, I need to breathe and simply stay present and peaceful in each moment, leading with my most authentic self and my soul's deepest values.

you never have to deal with more than one moment.

This is a pretty long article, but definitely one VERY worth reading. It really made me stop, breathe, and learn to take each moment at a time instead of giving into the hustle and bustle of all the stresses life brings, especially amidst finals and college life.

If you read Raptitude you’ll see me talk a lot about moments.  By the end of this post you’ll understand why I use that word so much.  I grew up thinking the word moment referred to specific instants in time, usually where some significant event occurred.  There were historic moments, life-changing moments, poignant moments, tense moments, touching moments, Kodak moments. They were events to be remembered, reminisced about, or photographed. 

Whatever they were, they held you captive.  Everything else seemed to drop away, and you just watched.  They seemed to be isolated from the normal, linear course of time. 

As for the rest of life, it just seemed to be the normal, steady current of ‘stuff.’  Some fun, some pain, some hope, some confusion, some excitement, some tedium.  Same same but different. 

When I was twenty, desperately leafing through some forgotten self-help book, I came across a peculiar line.  It didn’t astound me at the time, but it still stuck in my head.  It kept appearing in my thoughts.  I think I detected a hint of its significance, but it was years before I fully appreciated how powerful it is.  Now I believe it is the most important thing I ever learned: 

Life unfolds only in moments. 

Nobody has ever experienced anything that wasn’t a moment in action.  And all those moments have had one thing in common, they were all now once. 

So if you think about it, you may picture life as a whole stack of moments, like a stack of photographs that show what happens in your life instant by instant.  The present moment sits at the top, and past moments extend down from there.  New moments drop from above, as the seconds tick by.  That stack of moments is your life.  Right? 

Well, not really.  There is no stack.  If there were, you could just lift a photo out of the middle and it would be as clear and vivid as the one on top.  You could sift through your past at will, and see every detail just as if it were happening again.  You could pick a moment from way down in the stack, maybe your fifth birthday, and recall every detail. 

I remember parts of my fifth birthday, I think.  My mom actually made us cupcakes instead of a cake that year, one for each kid.  My guests’ cupcakes each had one candle, except mine had five because I was the birthday boy.  Of that I’m certain, but I sure couldn’t tell you what I was wearing, or list all the kids who were there.  I’ve got one or two details rattling around in my memory, but the moment itself is gone. 

Of course I have memories, but they are poor facsimiles of the moment they are supposed to represent.  Those memories are not a part of that moment.  They’re a part of this one, right now, where I’m sitting in front of my computer on the evening of April 1, 2009.  They are not a part of October 8th, 1985.  Even memories can only happen now. 

I cannot access my fifth birthday in any way; I’m stuck here.  Now. 

There’s really only one picture, but it keeps changing.  We can remember when it looked different, but we can’t see its past incarnations with anywhere near the clarity we can with the present one. 

So my fifth birthday is as dead as Ben Franklin. This sounds kind of sad, but it’s actually fantastic news. 

If the scope of life never extends beyond one moment, that means you never have to deal with more than one moment. You can bring all your attention and resources to bear on making the smartest move right now; there needn’t be any other considerations.  This means that there are not a million things to do, or a million people to please.  All you ever have to do is observe the moment that is happening, and pick an action that makes sense to you.
It often doesn’t seem like it, but life is always presented in these convenient, manageable slices.  The scope of your power as a person cannot extend beyond this single moving snapshot, so there is no reason to attempt to influence anything beyond it.  Observe the moment, pick what strikes you as a smart move, do it and watch what happens.  That’s the only responsibility you ever need to live up to.  It encompasses everything you can possibly do in life, so don’t kill yourself trying to reach further than that. 

You do not have to figure out your future, or come to terms with your past, because there is no future or past.  Any experiences that seem to be from the past or future are not experiences at all, they are just thoughts.  Those thoughts are all just features of the present moment. 

Try this: 

Hold your hands up, palms facing each other, one beside each ear.  Feel the heat radiating from your head, and get a sense of how small the space is between your hands.  It’s not much bigger than a basketball. 

Every single thing you’ve ever experienced, every sour memory, every embarrassment, every triumph, every great fear and every great hope, is confined within the space between your hands.  All conceptions or visions of your past and future are right there floating above your neck, and they cannot be found anywhere else.  They have no weight of their own, no permanence.  They can take no form other than that of a fleeting thought. 

Rather than experiences, thoughts are more akin to a sudden noise: they arise with a frightful clatter, and are just as suddenly gone, leaving no trace.  Unfortunately, the human mind has some inefficiencies.  The mind doesn’t automatically make a distinction between experiences and thoughts about experiences, regardless of whether those experiences are remembered, anticipated, or imagined. 

If they are mistaken for the actual experiences they represent, the person thinking them can react as such, with the same physical and emotional distress they might have if they were actually experiencing them. These physical responses can trigger other thoughts, and the subsequent torrent of ‘noise’ can take on the appearance of a whole lifetime of regrets and worries. They are still insubstantial thoughts, but the physical and emotional reactions they trigger are concrete and real. Simply recognizing thoughts as the phantom ruses they are can halt this process before it happens. 

Neither the future nor the past can ever be dealt with, and they don’t need to be. You only need to deal with your present-moment thoughts about them.  When you are not having thoughts about those two realms of time, they bear zero relevance to your life.  You can safely let them go and feel free to deal with the living moment at hand. 

This truth, once I fully understood it, released a huge weight from around my neck.  Life wasn’t crushing and heavy, it was as light as air.  Thin as a photograph.  I was finally able to look into each moment as if it were nothing more than an infinitely detailed and poignant living picture.  I could finally take the moments one at a time, because I understood that there never was more than one.  I could appreciate and observe each one, and know that my whole life lies within it, not just a tiny fraction.  There are no ghastly fears out there, stalking me from somewhere else, waiting to pounce.  If they existed, they’d be right here, in the picture for me to look at with the rest of the scenery.  Moments do hold me captive, and everything else does drop away. But they aren’t few and far between, they’re broadcast live, 24-7. 

Moments can be observed with clarity, and can be navigated deftly, but our whole lives are just too vast to be managed at all, no matter how strong or organized we become.  The crushing weight of one’s entire past is always too much to bear, as is the frightful spectre of another forty or fifty years rife with dilemmas and tragedies.  It’s far too complex; there are too many contingencies and unknowns.  Surely something in there will overwhelm or destroy us. 

A human being just can’t deal with that, and often it feels like the best we can do is distract ourselves from it.  But we don’t need to. 

We just have to recognize that there is no ‘out there’ at all.  Life is in right front of you, all of it, always.  And there isn’t any more to it.

become aware of a silent but powerful sense of presence.

“Incredible change happens in your life

 when you decide to take control of 

what you do have power over instead of 

craving control over what you don't.”

When I read this quote, it really struck me.  In life, so many things happen every day that we simply can't control.  People (including me) spend way too much time trying to control these unavoidable events, using up all their energy on something that won't ever change.  This causes people to feel discouraged and unsatisfied with their life.  This could all change if we spent less time on this and more time on acknowledging that a situation may not be ideal, but that we are strong enough to accept it and move on.  Of course this can be very very difficult, especially if it's something like a family illness or a death, but it's necessary if you want to fully live your life without letting the event consume you.

I think another thing I overlook a lot is that I CAN control what I focus on and what I make my priorities in my day to day life.  I tend to become frustrated with people who don't make an effort to keep up their friendship with me.  I spend way too much energy trying to keep it alive when maybe, right now it's just not meant to be.  Instead of doing this, I could easily be focusing on the amazing friendships I do have and wholeheartedly appreciating them more.

Also, I tend to make my priorities things that really do not matter in the long run.  I too often become so preoccupied with the hustle and bustle of mindlessly studying all week and going out all weekend that I don't stop, take a breath, and realize what's truly important.  I refuse to go through the motions of life, so I'm definitely going to challenge myself to take more time to reflect, slow down, and go after what has real value in my life, like my relationships with friends, family, God, and myself.

have the courage to choose happiness.

To me, this article from Thought Catalog encompasses how we need to look at the world every day.  Embrace each morning as a new beginning; challenge yourself to seek out every opportunity to grow as a person and to better the lives of others along the way.

It’s the end-goal of everything we do. It’s why we pray, get married, go to college, slave through tiresome days at the office, endure heartache, buy into fads, and move through (the sometimes unbearable) woes of everyday life…  and more importantly, it’s why we care so damn much about it all. It’s why we are so hurt when our lives don’t become what we had hoped they would be. Its happiness, and it’s at the root of everything we desire. But what we seem to overlook is that happiness is not an elusive state of euphoria that we eventually stumble upon once all of our goals are fulfilled. Happiness is a choice, and you are just as capable of experiencing it now as you will be once your life looks as you think it ideally should. 

Yes. Happiness is a choice. And you can choose it right now. Close your eyes and decide: today, I will be happy. Today, I will be grateful for everything I have, and know that everything I don’t have, I don’t need. See, the thing is, happiness is not contingent upon the next great thing you attain or accomplish. Ever notice that? You work hard for something, you get it, and then the joy of having it fades, just like everything else you have and don’t care about. And you’re on to assuming that you’ll be happy once you have the next thing. It’s how we’ve been conditioned: to work toward being better, richer, thinner, prettier, happier. 

But it’s not to say that aspiring to be better is bad. The concept of growth is, in my opinion, the purpose of existence: everything is for the development of our souls. So what if we took the energy we put toward making ourselves appear successful and happy and put it toward actually being happy, right now. What if we made the next goal to be happy… not in 15 less pounds from now, not in a $15,000 raise from now, not once we have the person we’ve been swooning over, not once we’re better. Just now, just because we’re alive, just because we’re here, and just because there’s something in us that the world needs. Because there is someone, somewhere, who loves us (or will love us) just as we are, right now. 

Happiness, if you think about it, is the biggest conundrum we face. The pursuit of it is why we do basically everything that we do, and yet, none of that effort is necessary: it’s the simplest choice of changing our state of mind. 

But if you’re worried that being unconditionally happy for yourself is selfish, consider this. Once you’re happy, you’ll find that you begin a domino effect. You’ll exude peace to others. You’ll make the first impact and the ripple effect of peacemaking will follow. My inner hippie has always believed that peace for the world around us has to begin within us. We’re all preaching and fighting (note the irony) for a more peaceful existence, and yet we’re not changing ourselves. So for the sake of your own happiness, for the sake of the world around you, and for the sake of everybody who you love and care for, be happy. Choose to fill yourself with love, light and positive energy. 

You choose happiness. You choose what success is. You choose your family. You choose your home. (I personally believe it’s the person or place you always return to, but that’s just me). What you may not realize is that every aspect of your life is changeable, and more important, beautiful, just as it is… because you’ve chosen it. You know what you have to do now, and just like more often than not in life, you know what the right thing is. It’s just having the courage to do it. It’s easy to sit in your misery and feel sorry for yourself. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that worrying about something will change it. 

Have the courage to choose happiness.

thought catalog. 

“happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder”

"The problem, often not discovered until late in life, is that when you look for things like love, meaning, motivation, it implies they are sitting behind a tree or under a rock. The most successful people recognize, that in life they create their own love, they manufacture their own meaning, they generate their own motivation.

For me, I am driven by two main philosophies, know more today about the world than I knew yesterday. And along the way, lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised how far that gets you."

- Neil deGrasse Tyson

This quote really struck me when I read it today.  Too often in life, people wait around for happiness to find them.  100% of the time, these people will end up disappointed long-term.  It's so important to consciously look for the positive aspects of life no matter what your situation is.  This can be extremely hard and downright impossible at times, but all you can do is try your hardest to acknowledge that life may not be ideal at the moment, but at the very least you will learn something about yourself through the struggles, and you WILL end up on top.  

In my life, a lot of the time I create images in my head of how I want things to turn out and they become so ingrained that I feel like it's the only thing that will make me happy.  In reality though, this is only keeping me from freely enjoying life and finding what will truly make me happy.  I am going to strive to keep this quote in mind and live by it the best I can- by simply living in the present moment, and reminding myself that if I enter life with an open, happy heart and mind, good things will come.

"life happens while you're busy making other plans"

"Know that you literally are where you are supposed to be.  You are learning this stuff exactly when you are supposed to.  You have to learn some stuff before you move on."

My mom said this to me earlier this week.  I was venting to her about different problems in my life that I'm too hard on myself about.  During this specific conversation, I was feeling discouraged and frustrated with myself; I felt that I wasn't living up to my highest potential.  I was looking for life to happen an exact way and it was increasingly straying from this ideal I had in my mind.  

This quote from my mom made me stop in my tracks.  I had never thought about it this way before.  Even though I tried not to, I always held high expectations for my life which inevitably led to constant disappointments.  This quote really spoke to me because it told me to stop and just live life.  By overthinking everything and having set expectations, I was refusing to let life truly happen.  

After this conversation, I vowed to myself to strive to go with the flow and be open.  Things may not always go my way, but at the same time, the best things in life happen unexpectedly.  As long as I stay true to myself and continue to foster my important relationships, life WILL work out.  It won't be easy to get out of my head, but the simple acknowledgement and acceptance of this tendency is the first step to allowing myself full freedom to live the best life possible.  It may not happen the way I initially want it to; however, it has the potentially to be so much greater than that, making it all worth it in the end.  

"Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won’t either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could."

11 important thoughts and reminders for your everyday life.

IMPORTANT: The thing about positive reinforcement and motivation is that often times it wears off. We’re all prone to rejection, setbacks, negative funks, heartbreak and misfortune beyond our control. Those things can seem like (or actually be) sicknesses, and sometimes the right combination of words serves as medicine. Hopefully this isn’t an excruciatingly painful tablespoon of “fruit” flavored cough syrup, and more like not-so-bad instant relief and a cure for the common rut — but make it last. I hope this lands on your bulletin board, in your bookmarks, or somewhere for you to refer to on dull days and difficult times. 

1. You woke up this morning! A lot of people didn’t. And a lot of people who did, won’t survive the day. This isn’t to depress you or make you think about death and get sad and stuff, it’s just a reminder that we’ve hit the jackpot having the opportunity of life. There’s always something or someone to be grateful for right this second, we just have to stop letting monotony diminish the value of and our appreciation for friends, family, good health, food, water, technology, and all that other amazing stuff. Gratitude y’all. 

2. There are some flat out mean-spirited individuals who have made spewing hate and negativity their sole purpose. When you identify one of these discouraging people trying to drag you down, slow your drive, crush your confidence or compact your dreams, don’t engage. Don’t react as if their words hold any merit, and don’t seek revenge. That will only veer you off track and turn you into a pessimist yourself. Do what you do and slap a hater in the face with success. 

3. Don’t compare or concern yourself with everybody else. We all know that person who is so successful, every time you speak to them it makes you want to go home and work on your résumé, but any time spent envying others or wondering why you can’t be in their position should be used productively, pursuing whatever makes you happy. There’s always someone doing a lot better than you and there’s always someone doing much worse. 

4. If there’s something you want, but it’s high risk, high reward — take that chance before you’re no longer able to. Rejection feels bad, failure feels awful, but regret feels the worst. Disappointment that we passed on something and the train left the station without us. A dream, a girl, a guy, words left unspoken – you can erase the possibility of having these regrets down the road, by taking a chance and at least knowing if it was or wasn’t meant to be. 

5. All of the best things will eventually end. I personally hate endings, I won’t even listen to the last track on albums all the way through, skipping back to the beginning before it can finish playing all the way through. The thing is, your current group of friends, the weekend routines you’ve adopted in recent months, the group of co-workers you adore – eventually people move, you leave, casts and locations change, and suddenly it’s a whole new show. Thoroughly enjoy whatever it is you’re enjoying until you right now becomes, “Remember back when…” 

6. Don’t judge. You ain’t Judy, you ain’t Joe Brown, and you definitely aren’t God, so refrain from condemning and labeling others. I know, it’s easy to make assumptions and have preconceived notions, but that’s why prejudice, narrow-minded folks, who confuse their opinions with facts and know exactly how everyone else should be living life are so common. We live in a world where passing judgment is commonplace and tolerant, accepting people are an endangered species. Remember, you simply don’t know a person’s background based on past experiences with individuals of the same gender, race, sexual orientation, belief system, etc. 

7. If you there’s anything you’re doing that makes you unhappy, and it’s being done for the satisfaction of somebody else, stop it immediately. No ifs, ands or buts — your time and happiness should never be sacrificed to fulfill the standards or satisfaction of others. 

8. You can’t remain at a job or in a career field that you despise. When your days off are spent dreading having to return to work or class, you’ve got to get out. It’s easy to think, I have bills to pay and this or that reason to stay miserable, and if that’s entirely true then you have to do what you can to live, but there are still ways of forming a hasty exit plan. Save up the funds to take an extended leave, apply at the place you actually want to work, take some type of progressive step toward a means of living that you find happiness in. That first step is always the hardest to take. 

9. Use your words! If you don’t know the answer, ask. Too often we try to read people’s minds instead of asking, and hoping for others to read our minds instead of us having to speaking about what’s on ‘em. Communication over psychic abilities all day, every day. 

10. Live below your means and you’ll be a lot better off. Even if you’ve mastered the paycheck-to-paycheck life (which is actually like being really good at being really bad at something), budgeting and not buying what you really can’t afford will result in less stress and close calls. 

11. Some problems you’ll have the power to change, other things will be beyond your control. Identify which type of issue you’re dealing with. If you’ve got some say in the matter, let your figurative voice be heard. When it’s literally out of your hands, have faith and believe it’ll improve. If a situation ever gets so bad that you feel as if you don’t have the energy or power to muster up wishing for a miracle anymore, just remember that there’s always a chance it’ll get better, no matter what it is. Keep fighting the good fight.

thought catalog. 

eckhart tolle's 10 powerful insights to a happier you.

• Don't seek happiness. If you seek it, you won't find it, because seeking is the antithesis of happiness. Happiness is ever elusive, but freedom from unhappiness is attainable now, by facing what is rather than making up stories about it. 

• The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral, which always is as it is. There is the situation or the fact, and here are my thoughts about it. Instead of making up stories, stay with the facts. For example, "I am ruined" is a story. It limits you and prevents you from taking effective action. "I have 50 cents left in my bank account" is a fact. Facing facts is always empowering. 

• See if you can catch the voice in your head, perhaps in the very moment it complains about something, and recognize it for what it is: the voice of the ego, no more than a thought. Whenever you notice that voice, you will also realize that you are not the voice, but the one who is aware of it. In fact, you are the awareness that is aware of the voice. In the background, there is the awareness. In the foreground, there is the voice, the thinker. In this way you are becoming free of the ego, free of the unobserved mind. 

• Wherever you look, there is plenty of circumstantial evidence for the reality of time—a rotting apple, your face in the bathroom mirror compared with your face in a photo taken 30 years ago—yet you never find any direct evidence, you never experience time itself. You only ever experience the present moment. 

• Why do anxiety, stress, or negativity arise? Because you turned away from the present moment. And why did you do that? You thought something else was more important. One small error, one misperception, creates a world of suffering. 

• People believe themselves to be dependent on what happens for their happiness. They don't realize that what happens is the most unstable thing in the universe. It changes constantly. They look upon the present moment as either marred by something that has happened and shouldn't have or as deficient because of something that has not happened but should have. And so they miss the deeper perfection that is inherent in life itself, a perfection that lies beyond what is happening or not happening. Accept the present moment and find the perfection that is untouched by time. 

• The more shared past there is in a relationship, the more present you need to be; otherwise, you will be forced to relive the past again and again. 

• Equating the physical body with "I," the body that is destined to grow old, wither, and die, always leads to suffering. To refrain from identifying with the body doesn't mean that you no longer care for it. If it is strong, beautiful, or vigorous, you can appreciate those attributes—while they last. You can also improve the body's condition through nutrition and exercise. If you don't equate the body with who you are, when beauty fades, vigor diminishes, or the body becomes incapacitated, this will not affect your sense of worth or identity in any way. In fact, as the body begins to weaken, the light of consciousness can shine more easily. 

• You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you and allowing that goodness to emerge. 

• If peace is really what you want, then you will choose peace.

oprah.

"my advice to you is to remember how vital family is"

Below is something I just came across that I posted about two years ago. Even though I realized the lessons I talk about when I wrote it, I can never be reminded enough about how important family is and how I should never take them for granted. Too often I do the opposite of what the post teaches. For example, I get frustrated with my dad's memory loss way too easily. Granted, it's extremely difficult adjusting from college to home life. I go from being able to (for the most part) remove myself from it and "forget" about it to having to come home and face it every day with expected unlimited patience. It's impossible! However, that's not an excuse. I need to learn to take a deep breath and simply try my hardest to give him a break and remember that he CAN'T remember and that he's trying his hardest. Every day spent with family is precious, and I need to especially remember that with mine.

Through the years, I have learned how important family is. You always hear how important they are, but it’s one of those things that goes in one ear and out the other, at least that’s how it used to be for me. That all changed about three years ago when my dad had a non-cancerous brain tumor. He had to have a surgery to remove it. During the surgery, there was a complication, and it resulted in him getting short term memory loss. Because of this, our family had to adjust to a new kind of living. My dad can no longer work. At night, he can’t remember what he did that day, etc. Our family had to become a lot stronger because of this. This kind of abrupt change in a family member is impossible to get used to- I am still not totally used to it. We had no choice, though, to accept it the best way we could and learn to live with it. It came as a surprise then, when about a year ago [almost four years ago now], my dad was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma, a rare form of blood cancer. A million questions ran through my mind- Why him? He’s very religious and goes to mass almost every day- why did he deserve this? Was it a punishment? Why did God let this happen to him and my family? For the next couple months, he was in and out of the hospital constantly, reminding me of his six week stay at the hospital three years back. Now, luckily, he is in remission. The doctors say that the cancer will unfortunately come back some time, but we are very hopeful for him to stay in remission for a long time.

The thing to get out of this story is very simple- family is the most important thing you can have. Before all this happened, I never thought about how lucky I was or how blessed I was to have such a loving, supportive family. Unfortunately, it took devastating changes in my life to make me realize it. I now never take anything for granted that I do with my family. Even family dinners can mean everything. Of course, this is easier said than done and at times, I’ll be annoyed at my mom or mad at my brother, but I try my hardest not to. Also, because my dad has short term memory loss, he doesn’t remember little arguments I have with him or if I am ever in a bad mood. It teaches me to focus on the important, loving aspects of my family and to not get caught up in the small stuff that gets me upset. My advice to you is to remember how vital family is. Also, no matter what they do, it is because they love you. Don’t take them for granted. Try to let the feeling go that you’re too cool for them- stay in one night and just spend time with them.

Also, remember that God is always there for you with any problems you have. Since my life has changed, I look to God a lot for strength and hope. Without Him, I do not know how I would have the strength to keep going and be positive. When my dad first was diagnosed with cancer, I was so confused with God. I wondered why he would do this to him. I didn’t know if it was a punishment or he just simply let it happen. Now, I have realized that He does not put anyone through anything that they cannot handle. He has made me a stronger and better person through all of this. He is looking out for every one of us and we just have to have faith to be able to see it.

“don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering.”

It's so important to make sure that you always take time to just simply be.  So often, we get wrapped up in doing what we think we should do and what everyone else thinks we should do. Sometimes, you gotta just let your hair down, make a nice cup of tea, and relax.  Some of my best thinking and reflecting occurs during this time, not to mention I feel so relaxed and rejuvenated afterwards. In a world of business and constant bustling around, it's easy to get caught up. Resist the need to keep up with everyone else and do what YOU need to do to make yourself peaceful and happier. Enjoy the simple pleasure of doing nothing and be endlessly grateful for the little things that make up who you are.

"one day you're 17 and planning for someday and then quietly and without you really noticing someday is today and then someday is yesterday and this is your life."

I think it's so important to have daily inspiration surround you.  For example, this is the background of my computer.  I have a peaceful image to look at and motivational quotes to read when I'm feeling discouraged or overwhelmed.  These little bursts of positivity don't seem like much, but they can be that little thing you need to get through the day.  Find what inspires you and incorporate it into your daily life.  Here are some other ways I've done it at school and at school-

strength isn't how much you can handle before you break; it's about how much you can handle after you break.

My dad had his brain surgery in 2006 in Indianapolis, as that's where the best doctors were. Indianapolis is about three hours away from my house in Chicago, so my brother, sister, and I were only able to visit him once for about three days. We came about two weeks after his surgery. Leading up to this visit, he had been predominantly unresponsive and was in intensive care. We would communicate with him simply by talking loudly on the phone to him while our mom pressed it up to his ear. We would say things like "I miss you" and "I love you", hoping that some part of him could maybe hear us.

When we got to the hospital, I had no idea what to expect. The first time we got to see him, he was awake and responsive. It was good to see him alive, but he was far from himself. He was asking us about a plane crash that he confusedly thought in and was making no sense. Tubes were all over the place and his entire head was bandaged. This visit was very short, as I ran out of the room in tears about two minutes into it. For the rest of the trip, most of it was filled with sitting with him while he rested. He slept so much at this time, and it was always a very deep sleep where not many people could wake him. The nurses would actually slap him or hit him to wake him up if they needed to. 

I was only 13 when all this was going on, so it's amazing to look back now and reflect on aspects that I didn't pick up on or dwell on. During the entire time in the hospital, I fought to hold back tears, hoping that I could keep it together and appear strong for the sake of my younger siblings. I think to an extent that's what everyone was doing, including my grandma and aunt who came with us on the trip. Nobody knew how to act or what to say- each minute was taken at a time because nobody truly knew what was going to happen to him. Was he always going to be like this? Was he ever going to be able to function alone? Would he always be so confused that even when he was clearly in the hospital, he thought he was in Florida on vacation with the family?

This may seem very strange, but as I think about it all now, the power of faith and God shines through this entire experience. I'm not saying any sort of miracle occurred, because he still has no short term memory and was affected drastically. However, even when he had no idea where he was, how old he was, etc., he still had an immense, ever present faith in God at his foundation. Often when he was in those deep trances of sleep, he would tightly grasp his rosary the whole time.  If you looked closely at his hands, you could see that he was ever so subtly moving the beads with his fingers, indicating that he was saying the rosary in his head.  

There's a chance this could have been a subconscious movement, but I now see this as a sign from God and from Mary.  Even when my family was seemingly falling apart and the leader of the family was becoming dependent on his 13 year old daughter, God and Mary were with us, guiding us through this difficult time, giving us hope.  It also shows my dad's tremendous strength and inner-peace.  Instead of being scared and acting weak during this tragedy, he stayed faithful, never losing sight of the fact that God WILL take care of him and of all of us and that He has a plan. Even when his world was flipped upside down and he had no perception of reality, he still had faith at his core, never faltering even at his lowest moments. This ultimate faith and strength is what I strive for each day, and what I hope to one day have.